this post was submitted on 12 Aug 2026
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screenshot of email

Subject: Your name is in the Epstein files

to me

Hi Elvis,

Apologies for the subject line. But in a sea of mails, this was the only way to grab your attention.

I am looking for a marketing role. My resume is attached. Please let me know if you are hiring.

Regards

top 12 comments
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[–] buckykat@hexbear.net 46 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

sell me this pen

If you buy this pen I'll stop saying your name is in the Epstein files

[–] Rom@hexbear.net 25 points 1 week ago

If it works it works

[–] alexandra_kollontai@hexbear.net 23 points 1 week ago

Marketing background coming in handy I see

[–] Juice@midwest.social 20 points 1 week ago

No resume needed, complete success

[–] batsforpeace@hexbear.net 18 points 1 week ago
[–] segfault11@hexbear.net 18 points 1 week ago

this is the firm handshake of the rawring 20s

[–] JoeByeThen@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago
[–] ConcreteHalloween@hexbear.net 15 points 1 week ago

It helps if the owner of the company's name actually IS in the Epstein files.

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 13 points 1 week ago

Job market is so fucked, there's nothing to lose.

[–] the_robot_from_planet_danger@hexbear.net 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Just letting you know you forgot to redact your name

[–] ThatVeganYouHate@hexbear.net 3 points 1 week ago

Luckily I stole this from the internet. I wish my name was Elvis, that would be awesome