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Have you looked into Tailscale or an equivalent solution like Netbird?
You could set up a tailnet, create unique tags for each machine, add both machines to the tailnet, and then set up each machine's network interface to only go through the tailnet.
Then you just use Tailscale's ACLs with the tags to isolate those machines, making sure they can only talk to whatever central device(s) or services you want them to, but also stopping them from talking to or even seeing each other.
I never considered tailscale for my LAN, but it's certainly an intriguing idea. I suppose running Headscale as a VM on my router isn't that difficult. Thank you, I will think about it a bit more
Yeah, and it's free for a basic account + up to 100 devices, so plenty for most home lab needs.