Hah, I've literally been there. Imagine a 9'x9' prison cell with two men, steel bunk "beds", and a solid steel toilet. Also, you're high on suboxone because there's not much else to do in prison.

You're a grown man, standing facing the toilet with wiener in hand, with another grown man's head like 3 feet behind your ass. Standing there for what feels like eternity. And you're thinking "Oh shit. He's going to think I don't know how to piss or something. This is weird. His head is way too close to my ass. Fuck, I'd better not fart. I forgot how pain killers and shit can make you unable to piss. It's got to be the sub I took. I have to go so bad but I don't know how to make it work. I did forget how to pee!"

And as you panic, your bunkie finally says something like "What the fuck, dude? Did you forget how to piss?" and all of your fears come true.

I could write a lengthy essay about how the design of modern western public bathrooms reflects our social hypocrisies, inconsistencies, and social ills. In fact I have been gathering thoughts for a while now with plans to do so.

And I too opt for a stall whenever possible, I'm a cis-presenting man but I still don't feel safe enough at a urinal for the pee to flow. But this stuff is often invisible to those it doesn't affect adversely.

I'm arguably a real man's man with typical man likes and man opinions but I won't for the life of me understand this macho stigma against pissing sitting down.

You have no toilet paper at urinals so you put your member back into your underwear with more residual piss on it than you would've otherwise, and splashback of piss particulates back onto your pants is also a thing.

Especially when you drain the lizard in or at something that's not one of those round specifically purpose built porcelain urinals. Like those unials that are just a big metal plate, a normal toilet, or a wall or tree.

Pissing with shy bladder protip: Do some multiplication tables in your head. What's 7x6? 8x6? 4x12?

Takes up enough concentration that it easily starts to flow. Made this trick up years back and it has never failed me.

I wish I could sit down when I pee, but my dick and balls are so long they get dunked when I do so. 😔

Here's some advice I received years ago for this very situation: if you're struggling to piss due to stage fright, imagine pissing on the head of someone you hate. Really imagine it. Imagine micturating all over their hair (or their scalp), the aghast expression, then them spluttering while trying to mouth 'What the fuck?' it does work. I don't know why it works - and I most definitely don't want to know - but it does work.

You're all most welcome :)

Then you pee all over your pants and shoes and have to tell everyone the sink sprayed you.

Meh I quit worrying about his ages ago. If someone has something to say I get ask them if they are a perv.

Cute comments and all, but is there a psychological explanation?