The worst was when it would get a kink and somehow no amount of twisting would get it back to a perfect spiral.
this post was submitted on 26 May 2026
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I used to work with a guy that worked at Apple Computers in the 80s/90s in Japan I think when they were getting into the market there. He described an anecdote from that era where Apple had a high volume of returns and were trying to figure out why, since the hardware was functioning when it was received. Turns out most of the returns were because the coiled cable for the keyboard would get messed up and not coil properly, which was inconvenient but acceptable in the western markets, whereas in Japan that was unacceptable for the average consumer.
Did you ever have that friend who just somehow tangled shit like this?
You’d let them use the phone one time to call home and now the cable is fucked forever.
the original arch from hell.
Talking with your crush and realizing you've wrapped yourself in the cord so you have to twirl around like an awkward balarina just to hang up (and your crush totally heard you do that, too you idiot).
The worst is when you're running through the house and you're not paying attention and you get fucking clotheslined by the stretchy cable, snatch the phone out of your mom's hand, smack yourself in the head with the phone that's now moving at four and a half times the speed of sound, and then your mom yells at you because you interrupted her call while you are laying on the ground with a fucking concussion and rope burns around your neck like a suicide survivor.
If you were lucky it was one of the newer handsets that only weighed a couple of pounds (still hurt like a bitch). Growing up in the '80s we had one that was probably from the early '70s that could be used to club baby seals.
Oddly specific.
I did say it was the worst for a reason. It's kind of difficult to have a general scenario worst situation.
Like there are a lot of bad ways to die accidentally, but falling feet first into a wood chipper that jams up when it hits your pelvis and you bleed out while screaming for someone to help you and all anyone does is stand around and start taking pictures for Instagram, that might be a worst.
Hmm, you paint yet another vivid picture, are you a writer perchance?
Not professionally, lol
Ah so you're an am-auteur...
Sorry I'll see myself out 🙈
I do only art in the morning.
This is the earliest known cable that could reach the bottom of the Marianna Trench.