ADHD

12498 readers

105 users here now

A casual community for people with ADHD

Values:

Acceptance, Openness, Understanding, Equality, Reciprocity.

Rules:

No abusive, derogatory, or offensive post/comments.
No porn, gore, spam, or advertisements allowed.
Do not request for donations.
Do not link to other social media or paywalled content.
Do not gatekeep or diagnose.
Mark NSFW content accordingly.
No racism, homophobia, sexism, ableism, or ageism.
Respectful venting, including dealing with oppressive neurotypical culture, is okay.
Discussing other neurological problems like autism, anxiety, ptsd, and brain injury are allowed.
Discussions regarding medication are allowed as long as you are describing your own situation and not telling others what to do (only qualified medical practitioners can prescribe medication).

Encouraged:

Funny memes.
Welcoming and accepting attitudes.
Questions on confusing situations.
Seeking and sharing support.
Engagement in our values.

Relevant Lemmy communities:

Neurodivergent Life Hacks

lemmy.world/c/adhd will happily promote other ND communities as long as said communities demonstrate that they share our values.

founded 2 years ago

MODERATORS

MrPoopyButthole@lemmy.world

MrPoopyButthole@lemmy.dbzer0.com

145

I genuinely care about my friends but forgot stay in touch (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) by Pin@lemmy.world to c/adhd@lemmy.world

20 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I genuinely care about my friends and family, but I forget to stay in touch and it makes me feel awful.

I’ll go weeks or months without reaching out, not because I don’t care, but because once someone is out of sight they’re out of mind. Then I remember randomly, feel guilty, and put it off again.

I’ve tried reminders, calendars, notes but nothing really sticks long-term. It’s especially frustrating because I do want to maintain these relationships, it's like my brain just doesn’t cooperate.

Recently I've found a mobile app that helps (after rummaging through the useless, overwhelming ones) but I’m curious does anyone else struggle with this? Have you found anything that actually helps, or is this just one of those ADHD things you learn to live with?

Edit: For everyone asking the app is called Kinly Connect

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] LouNeko@lemmy.world 50 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I always keep thinking: "A phone works both ways."
If I'm not reaching out, then what stops them from doing so? Oh, right...

[–] AddLemmus@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Exactly - my "autistic unload" is not really that interesting, and it's hard to be my friend. All while I am having a hard time to understand and process their situation and FEEL something about it. Got to keep myself off calling people just because they expressed interest in something I did or said at some point. If I called the last 2 or 3 times, it's time for them to make a move.

Pair that with various coping characteristics developed through decades, and I can be an annoying friend at times.

[–] LouNeko@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

From my experience, if the guy you've known since High-school, who you've been the best man at his wedding - if that guy first ghosts you when you wanna hang out and then proceeds to say "Next weekend, I'm gonna make time, just for you." and then you text him up on Thursday to ask if he's still up to hang on the weekend, and he says "Woops, sorry something else came up." 4 WEEKENDS IN A ROW, then maybe, just maybe, you've reached a point where you lived yourselves apart.

Seriously, I know I'm not the most important thing in anyone's life, but I didn't want to find out first hand how unimportant I truly am. Ignorance is bliss.

PS: If that first sentence were any longer, it would reach the moon.