this post was submitted on 26 Jan 2026
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Hey guys, I recently started to play with the thought to deploy a Snikket (XMPP) server on my VPS to play around with it a bit. I already had a Matrix (Continuwuity) server running on an older VPS with Docker at one point. But besides me using some bridges (WhatsApp, Signal etc.) it didn't see a lot of use. Originally I had set it up with the goal to replace Discord, but so far couldn't get my small group of gamer friends to switch to something else.

What are your experiences with XMPP (doesn't have to be Snikket) or Matrix? Would you recommend one over the other maintenance and/or usability wise?

Just curious what the community's current sentiment is in regards to private self hosted messaging services ๐Ÿ˜Š

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[โ€“] stratself@lemdro.id 5 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

I'm running continuwuity, and ejabberd as text-only IM servers to talk to some communities. The latter (and XMPP in general) has more moving parts (more ports, SRV records, etc) to set up, but messages deliver much faster and take much less resources. They'd probably both run fine on a VPS with the proper tweaks anyhow - the Rust-based server makes Matrix actually not suck after all

For bridges, I've used maunium-discord as a Matrix bridge in the past, and trying out slidcord right now. I think Matrix bridges still got better UI/UX due to more supported features (spaces/threads) and coherent clients, though let it be known Slidge is a hobbyist project. If your chat server is mainly for bridges, stick to Matrix and consider disabling federation. Also Matrix if you'd like your friends to switch over from Discord - it has more Discordesque features like custom emojis/stickers and SFU-backed group calls

Though this doesn't mean I'm unrecommending XMPP. I do appreciate its clients' snappiness, in-band notifications, the general ephemerality of its chats, and unrivaled efficiency. I kinda wanna write a blogpost comparing both software and protocols, but right now I don't have an opinion about one over the other. They're both cool albeit they both leak different metadata differently