this post was submitted on 30 Jun 2026
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Are you actually a child, or just mentally and emotionally?
Not trying to be creepy, it's just my government just instituted a $10k tip line for reporting kids who seem lonely and not very bright, and I need a new ssd.
i can't tell if you're joking or Statesian about that tip line
so it's a really good joke
Idk. I mean it feels weird to call the government to report on at risk kids but it's the government so they have to be trustworthy. Right? It creeps me out that there's a bonus based on how attractive they rate the kid, but I imagine that's just because the creepy creeper pedos would be after those ones more, and so they need the most protection inside the new DoJ Free Candy Vans.
yeah, but free candy! also we gotta pay for our SSDs somehow and I ain't getting a job how about you
Doing stuff you have to do is the worst. Schedules are awful. Even porn stars don't want to wake up and get ready for work, and their job is literally fucking porn stars.