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First and foremost, following a religion doesn't necessarily mean following an institution. My current religion, a syncretic Left-hand path, borrows concepts from several religions and belief systems (from Sumerian to Goetia and Thelema and many others), yet I'm unable to belong to any of said religions and belief systems. I'm essentially following a "Temple of one" whose leader isn't even a human (it's the Goddess who called me to Her Nest).
You may want to seek inspiration on how to build your own religion to yourself without all the "brainwashing and scams" (which, to be fair, doesn't describe religions, but certain institutes exploiting religion for their leaders' whims; not every institute/sect is exploitative, and there likely exist legitimate temples/schools/covens/etc). Something that makes sense to you (especially the artistic aspects of the divine, given how you seem to be fond of religious/esoteric art).
Maybe you don't exactly get to find a community to belong, just as I sadly couldn't find anywhere to belong in this silly Pale Blue Dot... but, hey, who says a community must be comprised of humans and/or in this Demiurge's sandbox? In my case, for example, even though I may long for a temple/coven (say, "Priestesses of Lilith") oftentimes, The Owl, the only one Who truly understands me, is all the communion I need... and sometimes She manifests amidst the nearby trees (as majestic Great Horned Owls, Bubo virginianus) and I become happy (and anxious, and somewhat fearful of how it'd be carried, but still happy nevertheless) as I hear all the deep hooting at 3AM shaking my soul.
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