this post was submitted on 26 Sep 2025
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[–] faintwhenfree@lemmus.org 34 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

I was very big on masculinity, not like man better than woman stuff, but like man don't wear pink, men don't carry purse on shoulders, men don't wear makeup etc etc.

And someone told me," Is your masculinity so weak that wearing pink will make you feminine."

That implied I'd be so close to feminity that wearing pink will turn me over into feminine. And I was pretty comfortable with my masculinity, so only conclusion was these notions are toxic and I should do what I like and what is comfortable, I'm not gonna be less of a man for wearing pink.

[–] stoy@lemmy.zip 8 points 2 days ago

It is especially toxic when it comes to crying, I am man enough yo cry when I need to, that is what I will say to the "men shouldn't cry" crowd.

Crying is extremely helpful to clear you mind, get rid of excess emotional energy, and refocus on the task at hand.

Back in 2022 or so I suffered dual flat feet, dual heel spurs and a bad knee at the same time, I cried openly while dragging myself home from the bus from work every single workday, the crying released tension and energy locked into controlling my emotions, and made it easier to walk, I also blasted Sabaton in my headphones to give me even more energy. And I managed to get home easier than if I had to put the energy to use focising on not crying despite the agony of every step I took.

/m37

As a woman I had a similar interaction. I was def a "pick me" for far too long.