ADHD

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A casual community for people with ADHD

Values:

Acceptance, Openness, Understanding, Equality, Reciprocity.

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Mark NSFW content accordingly.
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Respectful venting, including dealing with oppressive neurotypical culture, is okay.
Discussing other neurological problems like autism, anxiety, ptsd, and brain injury are allowed.
Discussions regarding medication are allowed as long as you are describing your own situation and not telling others what to do (only qualified medical practitioners can prescribe medication).

Encouraged:

Funny memes.
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Questions on confusing situations.
Seeking and sharing support.
Engagement in our values.

Relevant Lemmy communities:

Neurodivergent Life Hacks

lemmy.world/c/adhd will happily promote other ND communities as long as said communities demonstrate that they share our values.

founded 2 years ago

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Is it okay for a therapist to tell me to just accept this trait? (lemmy.zip)

submitted 1 hour ago by aavied@lemmy.zip to c/adhd@lemmy.world

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I have ADHD, and my therapist has confirmed it, just like the results of ADHD tests. He isn't bad, he greatly helps me with my depression. However, he doesn't provide an official diagnosis nor prescribe pills.

He says it's my trait and that I should learn to live with it. Like, take more breaks, find a motivation. Easy to say, hard to do. I can't keep up with the strategies he suggests, and I feel like I'm not trying hard enough.

The world doesn't wait for me. This trait is ruining my work and my routine, and it's stealing my money and my time. I can't start tasks, I can't concentrate, and I can't do anything boring or unpleasant.

For example, I can stare at a wall in the middle of a work task, with my hand over the keyboard, and lose myself in thoughts about my hobby. And I don't give a damn at this moment about all my reminders, the absence of irritants, and so on.

Of course, sometimes I can force myself "just to do it", but it costs a ton of energy (btw, because of my depression, I have a tiny amount of energy). It often requires a ton of luck, too.

Is this normal? Am I just complaining?

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[–] DrFistington@lemmy.world 5 points 56 minutes ago* (last edited 53 minutes ago) (1 children)

As someone with ADHD, there is a line where a 'trait' becomes detrimental. If it's keeping you from doing your best, or from holding down a good job, it's not a trait you should just live with. That's the line where a trait becomes a symptom of illness, that should be treated.

He sounds like he literally doesn't have the ability to give you the treatment you need. At that point he should refer you to someone that can, not just make excuses.

You need real treatment, which will require medication. You can't just therapy your way out of a disability, which is what ADHD is classified as

[–] aavied@lemmy.zip 1 points 46 minutes ago (1 children)

Thank you. I had my suspicions that he just didn't know how to work with it, but he was a doctor, and I wasn't, so I doubted it

[–] Reverendender@sh.itjust.works 3 points 38 minutes ago

One of the greatest lessons I learned in life, which actually took me decades, is to realize that not all doctors are a good at their jobs. In fact, in my experience, most of them are not. Once you realize that, and start doing some research, and start questioning what they’re telling you, and start thinking critically about what they’re telling you, you start to realize when it’s time to find a new doctor.