this post was submitted on 13 Jul 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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all 35 comments
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[–] homes@piefed.world 27 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

how tf does some amateur get front page?

[–] WhoIzDisIz@lemmy.today 7 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I'm afraid to ask what "pro"-level numbers start at.

[–] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Those are measured in BDPS: Bad Dragons Per Sphincter.

The shocking news is that the record holder is higher than one.

[–] slothrop@lemmy.ca 1 points 3 months ago

It's not a number, it's an eggplant.

[–] Pavidus@lemmy.world 7 points 3 months ago (2 children)

That was my first thought. "9 is a world record? I haven't even trained and I bet I could do that."

[–] homes@piefed.world 3 points 3 months ago

IKR? imagine what they could do with a little bit of lube!

[–] MrNesser@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago

I assume it's whole not crushed

[–] Fl1ppyR34@ani.social 14 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Sad to say this dude passed away in 2023...

[–] tacosanonymous@mander.xyz 10 points 3 months ago

What a treat for the croc. Like, a Russian nesting doll of flavors.

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 3 points 3 months ago

Wait! What?

[–] DigDoug@lemmy.world 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I hope they had an adjudicator watching them go up there. Since they changed the recipe, you wouldn't be able to tell just from watching them come out.

[–] luthis@lemmy.nz 5 points 3 months ago

And what a travesty that is. The new ones are terrible

[–] sundray@lemmus.org 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] WhoIzDisIz@lemmy.today 9 points 3 months ago (2 children)

The trick is to freeze them first so they don't melt before you can get them in.

[–] sundray@lemmus.org 8 points 3 months ago

That's a great idea!

noted!

[–] WhoIzDisIz@lemmy.today 6 points 3 months ago

This isn't a proper shitpost until they come back out.

[–] bajabound@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago

This is the kind of news I'd like to wake up to in the morning!

[–] panda_abyss@lemmy.ca 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] WhoIzDisIz@lemmy.today 4 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I think the more important question is: milk, or dark chocolate?

[–] luthis@lemmy.nz 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] WhoIzDisIz@lemmy.today 3 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

But I like to come in dark chocolate!

[–] CanadianCarl@sh.itjust.works 1 points 3 months ago
[–] luthis@lemmy.nz 4 points 3 months ago

This is the only way they are worth ingesting since they changed the recipe

[–] magnetosphere@fedia.io 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Wouldn’t the first few have started melting by the time he got to number nine?

Even though I’m asking the question, I’m not sure I want an answer.

[–] BreadOven@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago
[–] toynbee@piefed.social 4 points 3 months ago

Cool bum Luke.

[–] Kushan@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago

A lot of comments here from people saying they could do better, not a lot of people stepping up though!

[–] Lodespawn@aussie.zone 3 points 3 months ago

World record suggested there was an authorised records officer witnessing the record attempt ..

[–] SnailMagnitude@mander.xyz 3 points 3 months ago

Not thought about the big chap in a long time, I wonder what's up these days.

[–] japemasterBrad@programming.dev 3 points 3 months ago

Finally some good news

[–] Seimhe@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago

I remember what it's like to share accommodation too.

[–] NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 1 points 3 months ago

Only 9? Pffft, I could smash that record to pieces.

[–] Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 1 points 3 months ago

This is far more impressive than the pit bull bald cap thing I just saw.