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In the Navy, there was this woman with the last name Guzzler and she was a nuclear electronics technician, which meant that before hitting the rank of E-4 that she was a Seaman. She was Seaman Guzzler. The military is pretty misogynistic, and so even her superiors took joy in taking jabs at her as is the name Guzzler wasn't bad enough by itself for a woman in the military.
I still feel bad for her to this day.
NASCAR racing legend, Dick Trickle.
He was a badass, though. Legend has it that he had a hole drilled in the face shield of his helmet so he could still light up a smoke while driving.
That story makes no sense. He always used half face helmets. Even when he had a full face, he smoked through the window of the helmet. Sounds like a story a tobacco sponsor would promote.
Trickle killed himself after suffering years of chest pain definitively not due to his smoking.
Barry Sheene had a hole in his Motorcycle helmet for smoking.
He died of eosophageal cancer. Cool.
That's why I referred to the story as a "legend" (and it is a story that had been passed around for decades), not a fact that I can provide documentary proof of for a humorous internet comment.
Had a classmate who had the surname Fucke. He took his wifeβs name when he got married, as he was sick of the dumb jokes about his name.
I had asome soolmates with the last name Fuchs. Same kinda deal.
Knew a kid in elementary school who had the last name Gaylord, teased mercilessly. He would tell the teacher on the first day of class to just call him by his first name but they never did
βYa fuck ONE dog...thenβ
I guy I went to school with last name of Dick. Always said he would name his son Harry and daughter Anita. I really hope he didn't
There is a plumbing company in northern Virginia that is family owned. It was founded by Richard and is called Wacker Plumbing. Yes indeed his name is Dick Wacker.
Wtf were his parents thinking, that sounds like a pornographic stge nsme
Alternately he could have been Rich Wacker and Luigi'd some billionaires and it would have made for a great news cycle.
Had a guy I worked with named Butts, I was like, oh, its probably got some other pronunciation, so I said "Mr. Boots?"
He got VERY angry and shouted "ITS PRONOUNCED BUTTS" loud enough that other people in the office turned to look at us.
Null. There are articles online about people with this surname and the problems they face in everyday life.
For those who don't know, null means "nothing" or "missing data" in computer systems and databases. Properly coded systems handle it correctly but there are so many badly coded and/or legacy systems that simply crash or behave incorrectly when that surname is entered.
Its like the name equivalent of being born without or "losing" fingerprints
Had a teacher called Mr. Dick.
Professor Cox, will you please join Mr. Dick tonight at the Brown Hall?
Adcock.
His first name was Daniel, and his email (typical company first initial last name @ company) was indeed unfortunate.
A classic.
My surname is Mucous
I worked with someone back in the '90s who claimed he once worked for a Richard Butt, who would go by the nickname Dick. As mentioned, this was the '90s so it was well before the more famous dickbutt.
I once ran a credit card for a Richard P. Oreface
"Van De Neuker" which translates as "from the fucker". In ye olden days "De Neuker" was the man who went around with his male pig to impregnate the female pigs of other people.
I know a man with the last name "Raper"
The US ambassador to the UK during Trump's first term was Woody Johnson. In this case, though, he chose to go by it, so I'm assuming that he doesn't consider it unfortunate.
Bonar. Good middle school times.
Not just one but two. Weiner and Munch. Their offices were right next to each other and it didn't matter who was on either side. It was still comedy gold.
Laurens Nothdurft (AfD) (Notdurft is german for the urge to pee)
I know a guy with the surname of "Bator".
He's of course in my phone as "Master Bator". He's a good sport about all the jokes, luckily :)
Hiscock...pronounces hizzuck
There's someone making TV shows (producer or director) with that name, so on some pretty famous shows like Parks n Rec the opening credits have Norm Hiscock.
Actually Olivia Wilde's real last name is pronounced Coburn but spelled Cockburn.
I knew a guy in highschool whose last name was Butt. Even more unfortunate that his first name was Harry.
Butts. Had a plumbing company ironically. Butts Plumbing.
The classic ones are Dong. Grocery store I saw once had a the bulbs burn out partially. So when I passed it at night, it read Dong A 2 M (the arket lights where out). So nightly specials of dong, ass to mouth? Thought about writing a review but forgot where it was. "Great deals on food and groceries, but the nightly specials are something else."
Worked with a lady with the last name Hoare. (Not sure on the spelling, itβs been some time.) She was a very nice older woman from Australia, was always the first to make the joke.
Carr, Wayne... in England. Parents must have been right bunch of assholes.
IIRC he kept using his middle name, it's only through another colleague we found out
to segue, Asian company names can be great when they romanise them, "Pondscum Realty" in Cambodia. I have no idea what it was supposed to be in the original Khmer (Green Lakes or something like that perhaps ? ) but it always made me smile when i went past, this was a decade ago and I assume they used some shitty literal google translation.
Kerr. Not unfortunate at all unless paired with his first name, which was Wang. Not even joking. It wasn't a nickname, it was his actual name.
Cockfield
Titsworth
Butt.
He was a customer and I was instructed to greet customers by last, not first, name.
I barely held in the laughter when **** Butt popped up on the screen.
Zahomo
I believe their first name was Clayton
