I'm late but as others have said, your logic is a little wonky. I would prescribe a dose of philosophy. Start with Plato.
this post was submitted on 12 Oct 2026
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As a trans person get this so much. I've turned mean and dry as a person, specially to men. Somehow making fun of the men attracted to me gives me some sense of power I never have.
It's not less rewarding but I can agree, more exhausting.
Religion doesn't make sense to me either really, but stepping on other people to gain material wealth would not feel rewarding.
Can you maybe be more specific about how you want to be good in the world and let a little bit of the other stuff slide? You can't fix everything, and remember YOU are also a person you should be good to. Being selfless is hurting at least one person.
If you need medication to sleep and feel ok, there's probably something going on with your mental health. Not anything to do with whether you are "good" or "bad" just something to tackle so you can function in your life.
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If it wasn't, everyone would do it.
agreed, sometimes i think "god" is believed to be almighty but yet so stupid. if i am god, i will simply make system that instantly rewards nice person and punish bad person, then all is solved, world become utopia.
The ideal, if you want to get nice behavior out of people, is to be strict and fair at the same time with them. If people are nice to you, you treat them ten times more nicely. If people are mean to you, you treat them ten times more meanly, and seek out every opportunity to break their happiness until they surrender. You do not have to be evil; it is not good to always be mean like the evil people do, since they create enemies who will come to you for support, and that is their weakness. You just have to be just and measured, rewarding those who do you well, and punishing those who do you wrong.
I think I agree with your observation. Simple example:
I tried reducing hobbies to image printing in alternative photography: CMYK... simple except that no matter what store you visit everyone already bought the M magenta. Specifically M122 quinacridone magenta because it's transparent and permanent lightfast.
It doesn't matter little thing we do, the orange asshole at the wheel is working to fuck it up. Now thanks to inflation I have to think about not retiring and maybe a second job. Just don't get sick until you bite the dust.
Anyway, I think maybe you should just be as open-minded as possible to understand each misfortune for what it might be so you can adjust the way you are or expect. Like getting ghosted by a friend... maybe you are way tooo much and they can't stand it. Maybe they changed something like got a girlfriend or boyfriend that doesn't really like you. Maybe they got a second job?
yeah must be suck when you decided to retire and life decided that you are not allowed to.
i already make sure that i am being as nice and friendly as possible but yet those "friends" still ghosted me
So a bunch of the things you wrote have nothing to do with being nice. I wonder if you could provide a clear definition of what being nice actually is. Religion? Sleep? That's got nothing to do with niceness.
But look clearly you need to think about who you're being nice to. If a person treats you like dirt, there's no good reason you should try to be nice to them... So I'm trying to figure out what your framing is, because maybe you took some advice somewhere and applied it recklessly and thought you would get good results.
Because it's constructive, simply put an explicit and constant effort. Your work is being cooped by other people, but it's your work nonetheless. Evolve to find better ways to protecting it if you can - is the general notion. Your mileage may vary.
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Being a nice and good person is its own reward. It doesn't matter if you were nice and got taken advantage of. What matters is that you were nice. It doesn't matter that you saved money and it was hit by inflation. The point is that you saved money. What results from your actions can never be guaranteed. The point is that you did what you thought was right.
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it feels like this in video games where you actually get rewarded more for being evil.
Kotor my beloved
video games often based on real life so i am not suprised
Modern people in my experience work under the idea of "everyone's dirty so it's fine if I'm doing amoral acts", if you're doing the opposite you are showing them that there's a way, integrity, goodness or whatever you wish to call it. They will hate you for it, but that's not a fault of your own, it's just their psyche trying to defend themself, not quite extensional threat but to their eyes it's an eye sore.