This guy has ruined satire news...
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Satire now would just be him doing anything like a normal sane president.
Noice country ya have here, vary vary noice...would be a shame if someone invaded it....wunnit?

Trump is a genius inventor: he keeps coming up with new ways to take bribes
It's a coin operated system. Insert $25M for the next 6 days of peace.
Why can't they just make a Discord server for free instead??
First one trump invited is ofcourse putin ... ???

On Friday, the White House presented the composition of "a founding Executive Board", consisting exclusively of figures loyal to Trump: his Middle East adviser Steve Witkoff, his son-in-law Jared Kushner, Secretary of State Marco Rubio and former UK prime minister Tony Blair.
It's astonishing how often Tony Blair manages to find new ways to be a massive fucking disappointment. It's like he's already concluded that he's going to hell for the whole Iraq thing so he'd may as well lean into it by being a huge cunt while he's alive.
"I am a Nigerian Princess and I am going to start my own UN. If you decide to invest a billion dollars in it now, you are guaranteed to at least double your investment by the end of the year."
A board of peace - after telling the Norwegian prime minister that he's not committed to peace anymore because he didn't get the peace price (and no, the PM doesn't control the peace price)
The US government is now a racket headed by an infamous NY gangster that made a fortune scamming people in the real estate business.
History does beat fiction
Rimmer: United America? Who's that?
Kryten: Well, at the end of the 23rd century, America attempted to bring peace to the world by asking every nation on Earth to sign a peace treaty.
Any nation that refused, they invaded.
Now, a war ensued that was called the War Against War. Those countries who went to war because they were so against war, they were prepared to go to war to fight in a war against war, called themselves United America.
(Sorry can't find a better source)
A "Board of Peace" membership and a 100 Euro bill are worth 100 Euros combined.
He doesn't know how to spell, its meant to be "Bored of Peace"
The document describes a mechanism resembling the "purchase" of influence: standard membership in the Board of Peace is limited to three years and depends on the will of the chairman. This restriction is lifted for states that contribute more than US$1 billion in cash to the fund within the first year.
"Decisions would be taken by a majority, with each member state present getting one vote, but all would be subject to the chairman's approval," Bloomberg says.
Pay a billion to get a vote, and everyone gets a vote...
But trump can overrule any vote...
And he can kick anyone out that he wants, so if you ever go against his opinion of the moment, he'll kick you out.
Why the fuck would any country pay this?
Why the fuck would any country pay this?
Same reason they would gift Trump an airplane?
Bored of peace....
Board of peace has the same energy as ministry of truth
It costs money to join the axis? This will break the future Hearts of Iron IX mechanics.
So a protection racket, in other words.
Setup by the dollar store godfather wannabe
Ever since trump got elected, the news has been either bizarre, devastating, hilarious, insane, removed, cringe, maddening....
Can that heart attack come already? Come on, McDonald's hamburgers, do your job
It's is honestly amazing just how giving stupid this man is. Like, I am amazed.
Sounds like a scam
It's Trump, so the odds are ever in your favor.
Well, after he got a Nobel Peace Prize, it makes sense that he moves onwards towards his next great wish: King Of The World.
The stupid thing about this is the US already has a disproportionate amount of influence in the UN. Greed is something that can't ever be satisfied.
The 1bn requirement is a great way to make sure countries in the global south can't join.
didn’t he just threaten denmark that he’s done with peace because he didn’t win the peace prize 😑
And what if they don't, will he kidnap their Presidents too? Or maybe tarrif them?
The grift goes on.
Outside of the overt extortion for entry bit, how would this be any different than the current UN where the US unilaterally controls basically every decision or its consequences?
It's called the board of peace so we can assume it will be a global Mafia demanding protection money, and going to war whenever it's the more profitable outcome.
The kind of group that should be nuked from orbit.
TL;DR: Trump decides to let countries pay him a billion dollars to join his own UN ripoff
Well, that’s one way to start the new Axis powers. The internal fascist structure could be a gamble (usually even other fascist leaders want to have more authority than deference), but I guess we’ll see how it goes.
Every pro Trumper I know also has a deep fear of the UN or some shadowy organisation controlling the world. Every conversation ended up with "Well at least he will take back power from the elites". Now Trump declares he wants to rule the world, and outlines their exact fears as his plan and they are silent. No comment. Why are people so stupid? And pathetically so. It not even hard to see how ridiculous this guy is, but people are still bowing down to it.
Always projection. As long as it's their guy doing it, yay team.
It's WWE politics.
I still remember when people were fearmongering about Obama enacting martial law.
Sounds like the league of nations just collapsed
That's cute but where are the Epstein files?
The "in cash" part is quite interesting...
"Bored of peace" coalition
I sure do love being an American (I don't)

"Board of Peace" tracks better than "Golden Dome". Good phrase donny. That'll make everyone forget about your pedophiliac degeneracy.
Can we start a go fund me to remove him from office since no one else with the power has the balls to do so?
Trump doesn't honor any agreement he signs,why would anyone be stupid enough to agree to this.
He will just keep increasing the price.
