this post was submitted on 21 Feb 2026
187 points (100.0% liked)

Not The Onion

20501 readers
844 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

Immigration and Customs Enforcement officials this week reported that the death of a 55-year-old Cuban man at a detention facility in El Paso was the result of the staff’s “spontaneous use of force” to “prevent him from harming himself.” Officials quietly updated the cause of death after previously declaring last month that the man died of “medical distress.”

all 13 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] aramis87@fedia.io 31 points 5 hours ago (2 children)

His death is the first homicide in ICE custody in recent history

Press [X] to doubt.

ICE officials wrote in that report that while detained at Camp East Montana, Lunas Campos received “regular” medical evaluations

Press [X] to doubt.

Lunas Campos’ death “is still an active investigation, and more details are forthcoming,” the spokesperson said.

Translation: This is the least-damaging version we can use as an explanation, given the facts that the public currently knows. However, we reserve the right to change our story if additional information get leaked.

The federal government tried to deport the six detainees who witnessed the final moments of Lunas Campos.

The actions of a totally innocent bureaucracy, definitely not panicking ...

The whereabouts of those witnesses are currently unclear

Yeah, I'm going to guess it's not anyplace good.

Only after the [public] medical examiner advised his family that it might be a homicide did ICE officials allege a suicide attempt. [...] Eleven days after Lunas Campos’ death, 36-year-old Victor Manuel Diaz marked the facility’s third fatality. ICE sent Diaz to a U.S. Army hospital rather than the local medical examiner, where a military spokesperson said that the agency would not make his autopsy public.

So there's an ongoing cover-up in this third [known] death, got it.

Fuck ICE.

[–] Bane_Killgrind@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 2 hours ago

Quite frankly, Mr Perkins, if he wasn't dead, I'd have him deported

That's a load-bearing "recent" in your first quote, it's doing some world-record heavy lifting.

I am suddenly overwhelmed with concern for all those ICE mooks who might harm themselves.

[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 46 points 6 hours ago (2 children)

They harmed and killed him to prevent him from harming himself? Am I the only one who thinks that this is a rather lame excuse?

[–] Pirat@lemmy.org 13 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

Harks back to the Viet Nam war. We had to destroy the village to save the village. I believe this is the one where the Pulitzer prize winning photo of the naked little girl running with massive burns from napalm happened.

[–] marine_mustang@sh.itjust.works 5 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

I think that was entirely separate from the napalm girl, but the fact that over 50 years on from the fact we can still think of so many such cases in common memory that we're mixing them up is telling.

[–] grimpy@lemmy.myserv.one 11 points 5 hours ago

ok they killed him to keep him from harming himself???

[–] AmbitiousProcess@piefed.social 10 points 5 hours ago

So if my fist spontaneously uses force against a fascist's face, it's legal? Oh wait, I forgot, laws only apply to the people who don't like fascists now.

It is incredible how many transparently bullshit euphemisms they are coming up with

[–] Darthcapi@piefed.social 6 points 5 hours ago

They failed miserably