Yes, Gregg, we all know what blacking out is like.
I know some people that can help you with this.
this post was submitted on 23 Mar 2026
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How can you pack so many high level idiots in a single country? truly a feat.
It's easy when you kick out all the smart ones, or render their fields of study obsolete by ceasing to pay for their research, forcing them overseas.
Well you see, half the voters decided it would be a good idea to elect total outsiders with no relevant education or experience, whose only qualification was a willingness to say crazy shit out loud. The unqualified outsider-in-chief has now packed high-level offices with his favorite TV and podcast personalities, who also have no relevant education or experience but have made a living saying crazy shit out loud.
I bet he's gonna teleport away some funds.
Where does that land on the Waffle House Index?
Bout three fiddy
A code red on the waffle house index would imply the resturant is gone. Clearly the teleporter is still working so it cant be that bad.
Anyone who was a party animal worth their reputation during their early twenties eventually ends up past midnight at a greasy spoon. Chowing down on comfort food trying to sober up and keep the contents of their stomach down. With them waking up in the morning hungover and little to no memory about what transpired over the course of the last twelve hours, give or take.
First you have Waffle House, then you stay up until the donut shops open at 4 cuz let’s be serious that’s only another half hour at this point. You get too many donuts, because who doesn’t want copious amounts of sugar and fat on a stomach full of alcohol? Also because you are drunk and they all look good. Then you crash, maybe with a half-eaten donut in your hand.
As a bonus, you wake up to something some people consider a breakfast food.
I was with my boys one time, and I was telling them I was gonna go to Waffle House and get Waffle House. And I ended up at a Waffle House
this was in Georgia
Being in Georgia, I mean.
Nothing is too stupid for 2026!
I almost feel sorry for these sane USians who have to live there during Trump reign 🤣
There’s a reason I live in a van out in the boonies
Please tell me that there's a river nearby
Mostly the Sacramento River
Yes! I hereby declare you the second coming of Matt Foley!
Wow, thanks, that’s quite the honor. I hope I can live up to his legacy.
I think the trick is copious amounts of cocaine!
Isn't it always? 🤷🏻
*down by the river
We prefer the term- Trumpistanians. Thank you very much
Ugh, they probably use digital clocks, too
I find Ambien gives me the same abilities he's describing.
Unfortunately the effects are only temporary.
I haven't figured out how to teleport without Ambien, yet.
Next we'll have the ghost of Macho Man Randy Savage running a government agency
His car was lifted up and transported to a ditch 40 miles away...