weird timing for me to see this. my appointment is tomorrow.
this post was submitted on 11 May 2026
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Bring lube, like a very large container of it clearly labeled. Ensure everyone sees it and refuse to acknowledge it. It's just your "bedtime supplies".
If it's not a 55 gallon drum, don't even bother bringing it.
Don't forget the single application attachment for only 3.99 more !
Personally, I find that just submerging yourself in it is far more effective than putting it on from the nozzle.
"Masturbating before sleep is how I fall asleep. Don't they want real world data?"
"Ok but do you normally stare directly into a scientist's eyes while jerking it?"
They are in a different room. Idk if they have cameras though.
Five nights at jorker's
Yes but I'll admit the flicking of my tongue and licking my lips are not normally done.
Not in 3D usually no
Whoa...
What's jerking off in 4 dimensions like? :O
Length, width, depth, and duration. Everything you do is in 4 dimensions!
I don't have duration. Johnny Come Instantly is what they call me.
It's actually axial rotation
You used to be Johnny Come LATEly but then you found your kink
Yes that's ideal. And I know this is my 50th sleep study. I needed another one, and I will continue taking them. Yes, my insurance quit on me long ago, I don't care how much this costs, JUST TAKE MY MONEY, HOOK ME UP AND LOOK ME IN THE EYE
"No, I usually stare into the photo of my deceased grandparents."
Before reading the comic, I assumed "B" meant "bitches".
Note: At 2:32pm The patient switched hand.
lol, told you he'd go to coomer first. You owe me $60
A Friend of my spouse was in hospital and awaiting surgery (a stint or bypass it something) he was very bored and decided to rub one out on the toilet.
He was still connected to the heart monitor, though, so whilst he was at it the nurse came to the door and ask him if everything was ok. This ruined his immersion and thus could not finish so then he was bored and slightly blue balled
Immersion in...?
His hospital toilet kink
The sexual fantasy whilst chugging on his wang
I have had a holter monitor strapped to me twice; the first time, a totally typical day, including the usual freaky shit. The second, I was better prepared and came before the appointment.
As far as I'm aware there wasn't a meaningf difference in the results. And jerking it might give better, more accurate results, if it's a regular scheduled activity.
It's not like you'd be the first one to do it. If you like an audience, even better. If you've got it, flaunt it.
I had a full sleep study done that included a holter (and a microphone, lol). I did consider exactly that, but all the wires made it a pain in the ass just getting up to pee, let alone getting freaky
How about exercising with the monitor? Like if that's part of my regular day.
Never have had holter monitor, but few of my friends said they need to stand still while it measures. That would make working out kinda harder.
They give you a little diary to write down stuff like that.
Good to know. Thank you.
Also your friends are like… wrong about the standing still part, no idea why they told you that. It’s basically just a portable EKG attached to your body that you wear while going about your normal day.
They might have been joking or it could have been some odd recommendation from the doctor.
Or they were talking about something else like a regular EKG. Anyway, exercise with a holter should be fine, showering with a holter might be a little annoying or not even possible unless you get new contact pads.
I was told both times, absolutely no showering or bathing. Maybe for the 72h one they give you new pads to swap out?
Probably not, I suppose most people would put the pads in the wrong positions. Also sleeping with a holter was super annoying.
Most sleep studies take place in a visually observed room at a doctor's office
This changes nothing
I've been given some equipment that recorded my breathing and heartrate (little tubes near my mouth and nose, chest strap). just check em out and return them the next day.
In those cases you should do your bedtime routine before turning it on, though. The jerking is clearly part of the bedtime routine here.
You mean an audience?
I mean... That's part of the study.