Just find the air intakes and get creative
this post was submitted on 01 Jun 2026
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How much glitter can a HEPA filter hold?
Enough to be faaaaaaaaabulous!!!!!!!!!
How much surmstrong can it block?
Expanding spray foam insulation oughta do the trick
Fart
this guy stink bombs
That's funny, but I can't imagine someone spending all that money on a bunker without a positive air pressure system thats intake has NBC filters, solvent filters, etc. It'd be like shelling out thousands building a gaming rig with a 480i, monochrome, CRT monitor.
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Well, the problem will be their perimeter security.
You'd essentially be treated as a VBIED, and lit the fuck up by assault rifles and/or swarms of suicide drones.
So... you could maybe attempt the 'killdozer' strategy...
Or, you could try low visibilty / high mobility.
Motorcycle, fuck maybe even an E-Bike, and hand made thermite charges.
Shitty thermite is really not that hard to make.
If you got through either AP Chem or a first year of Chem classes at Uni, and you can read the wikipedia page for thermite, you can probably figure it out. Also not that hard to figure out how to ignite it. Sparkle sparkle!
Just melt the air vents.
For further creativity, either wait for or stage nearby distractions.
And then have a very thorough plan to completely fucking vanish.
... you'd also have to, you know, gather all the required supplies for any plan, in a manner that does not raise anyone's suspicions, and probably do some tests first.
That's the nearly impossible part... you will almost certainly be unexpectedly meeting with Mr. FBI during that stage.
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Every bunker has at least one secondary "escape" hatch" in case the primary entrance is obstructed - generally it's buried and isolated/insulated from the thermal mass of the rest of the bunker so it doesn't show up on IR, but a metal detector will work wonders for finding them.
So you need two cement trucks.
One cement truck, a metal detector, lawn chair, 12 gauge, and some beers oughta do it.
This guy ~~fucks~~ hunts!
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You can also find them with ground penetrating radar since they tend to use sand as that insulating layer. From underneath they open a hatch and drain the sand out to clear the escape hatch. A big block of sand is plain and obvious to identify on a 250MHz system.
I'll just use my Amazon basics ground penetrating radar then
Sounds like you have a suspicious amount of experience
I'm guessing utility location.
Every bunker will be built by people who won't be invited to live in it. The locations of all exits, vents, water supplies, etc. won't stay secret for very long.
That's why you kill the workers in tragic accidents.
That's where the bee truck comes in.
What's this? A bunker full of billionaires unbothered by bees? My dump truck full of bees ought to put a stop to that!
Thanks, doctor bees!
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Why is everyone assuming the truck is actually filled with concrete? Mythbusters famously demonstrated they can be used to carry, and mix, a wide variety of products.
Like fertiliser contaminated with diesel, for example.
A cement truck full of cement is much easier to steal than a cement truck full of anything else.
A cement truck empty of cement would be marginally easier to steal than a cement truck full of cement...
The problem becomes filling that cement truck with anything else, though...
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Just set ANFOgetaboutit.
They'll have to have ventilation, so dump as much liquid nitrogen down there as possible. It will convert to gas at a rate of 696:1, and fill every nook & cranny of the bunker with pure nitrogen gas, which will solve the problem within a few breaths.
THEN encase it in concrete, and leave it for some archeologist to discover in 10,000 years.
The tombs of the wealthy will be raided a pillaged like the tombs of the pharaohs.
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It’s more likely to be the mercenaries that already killed said billionaire and now control the compound.
Be careful might want to killdozer-up the cement truck first.
Finally a vault that Bethesda didn't think of.
A vault full of gollums, sealed in with concrete.
Aside from being sealed by concrete and not the vault door, that pretty much is like half the vault experiments. I would even include the Gary clone vault as one. Those clones were fairly gollum like.
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If they are hiding in their bunkers because of an ecological disaster then we're all screwed. If they are hiding in their bunkers from us...then we'll get 'em eventually.
I say TWO cement trucks, just to be sure. We have nothing better to do.
would that be THIEL tyring to flee to argentina. I read NEW Zealand blocked his bunker construction, thats why hes going to argentina instead.
As is tradition.
They aren't sitting in their bunkers because they don't need to. People have still too much to lose to try making the concept of consequences real for billionaires.
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You may want to hold your breath Zuck.
Here is the thing about bunkers. Unless they have installed some way to power that bunker and provide water and food that cannot be destroyed, it's a self-made trap. They can be ignored and the denizens will die in the cold damp darkness of starvation and dehydration. With a probable side dose of madeness.
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