32 ounces of medium rare ribeye steak, bowl of spaghetti with alfredo sauce, 30 chicken wings (10 buffalo, 10 BBQ and 10 garlic butter), 750 of eagle rare 17 year bourbon, pint of peanut butter ice cream and a 2 liter of Dr. pepper.
this post was submitted on 02 Jun 2026
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I'm curious about your preference for spaghetti with alfredo sauce. Why not fettuccine?
Same question. Less curious, more saddened.
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Cheeky 30k bottle of booze in there, are you working on that through the meal or is that the grand finale?
I edited because I realized I had the 17 year before not the 30. Did a quick google of the oldest eagle rare because thats what I thought I had. Turns out it was a 17. So the low low price of like 2 grand instead 😉. It'll be sipped throughout and then demolished when I'm ready.
Just a ton of bacon, egg, potato, and cheese breakfast burritos with some good salsa, a pile of churros, and 100 cans of Juicy IPA.
Edit: Hell, with the state of things right now, give me a guarantee that I would get that as my final meal and I’ll do a crime that’ll get me there.
tbh I think Id be in no mood to actually eat anything, and trying to decide on anything in that circumstance sounds like itd just compound the anxiety , so given that itd be kind of a waste of food and wouldnt be of much comfort, Id probably just turn it down.
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Two double cheeseburgers from MacDonald’s.
- ten pounds of laxative chocolate
- enough acid and molly to set my brain on fire
- ipecac capsule as a petit four that can be taken on my way to the execution chamber
I'm going the same way I came. covered in shit, vomiting, and screaming to go back.
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I'd eat the judge
Chicken fried rice, lots of it.
Honestly for me, I think I'd want a Berlin gemuse kebab, probably the Mustafa's one (mit käse of course) given I've got a lot of good memories attached to it.
Serve it up with a nice citrusy IPA
Probably finish with a tiramisu made by an Italian nonna
After seeing all the memes about how many calories are in uranium, that would be fun to try.
Self heating
Just as it comes or would you like a dressing?
Hmm, how about shavings of uranium garnishing a massive chocolate lava cake with whipped cream (the real stuff made from whipping cream, not the stuff from a can or the abomination that is cool whip)
I'd probably just want something simple that'd bring back good memories from childhood, like battered, pan-fried plaice with remoulade sauce and some lemon wedges, that always felt like a luxury meal when I was a child, that'd be soothing, a last chance to remember a time of innocence.
Root beer float, mozzarella sticks, an Arby's beef n' cheddar, and a medium pizza from my favorite local place with the little grease-cup pepperonis, mushrooms, and 12 tabs of acid.
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Monkey brains.
I'm going to die, fuck it. I'm going to try something I've never eaten.
Anything on the planet you say?
Well I wanna eat the entire planet...
Not sure if the planet could be considered on itself
Hush, while I eat you too...
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The heart of my enemies
2 chicken parmas with hot chips, 1 litre of pisto, a bubble o'bill and a few caps of mdma YEEEEEWWWWW!
No there is no clever way to use this meal to escape your fate
Give me a ricin ball. I'll still die, but it will be on MY terms.
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A slice of pizza, a piece of Carnegie Deli cheesecake, and a small saucer of fentanyl.
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2kg of the Korean fried chicken with the spiciest chilli sauce on the planet. A case of beer to wash it all down.
Pan pizza and wheat beer. Maybe I can't escape my fate, but I can make it... quite messy for the executioners.
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A really tall glass of whiskey on the rocks, an edible, a drop of acid, heroine, mushrooms.
Make sure im strapped down though. Give me headphones and just let me chill with music.
Then I want a few Mexican tamales with a side of Puerto Rican rice. Then on the other side some genuine South Korea chicken.
I want the guards to also partake in this feast and my goodbye to this world.
Just make sure the physician stays sober.