“The floggings will continue until morale improves.”
this post was submitted on 16 Jun 2026
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Celebrate your increased workloads peasants.
the onion timeline
HAVE FUN EVERYONE! ... You know what? Let's have a game of MUSICAL CHAIRS!
Another forced reassignment? Fuckin' A, man!
And I said, I don't care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I'm, I'm quitting, I'm going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they've moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were merry, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn't bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it's not okay because if they take my stapler then I'll set the building on fire...
"You better have fun and love your work so much that you do unpaid overtime, or else!"
My company has been reducing force multiple times and did one round in a particularly shitty way. Our bonuses were the lowest ever this round despite us all having had to carry more weight. They wonder why our morale is shit.
like 7 of 9 in voyager, where she alotted 1hr of FUN each day. cyborgs/androids knows best. "Hello Fellow humans, fun will now commence until it reach satisfactory parameters"- zuckerborg.
Goddamn CEO petty kings and dictators. Everyone is just a production unit to them.
Solution is simple, learn to code. (sad trombone)
Feast on their entrails!
TikTok’s at the salad bar are back in vogue!
INITIATE TANGENTIALLY UNPREDICTABLE ACTIONS
To raise morale they will have a thing in the lobby at Meta HQ where you can pick up a Rohinga or Palestinian child and throw them at a giant velcro target on the wall. If you can stick your child to the right spot on the target, you get removed from the layoff list!
"Zuck" is able to stick those kids on the target every time -- even wearing his VR glasses, so anyone else who cant do it too is unworthy to be employed there.
Are you not entertained? Suffering is just another game to them.