Thats very fair! Similarly, I looked at r/unixporn and wanted whatever they have. I gotta admit - that WAS a motivation for me hahaha
Other DEs or gui frameworks support proper theming, adwaita has it's reasons to ignore it. I'd love to see/hear about cool things you can do with qt theming or whatever, but whenever I got theming related things on my screen, it's about how adwaita/gnome sucks and will kill your childlike wonder
I honestly don't get the adwaita hate. These apps try to be simple and functional. This is the software for normal people who just want things to work. I used to care about theming my desktop a lot, but I'd rather have apps where form follows function (is that how you use that phrase?)
And there are projects that do bring almost enough theming to adwaita ("almost" = I saw 1 issue for me - rewaita is still pretty amazing): https://github.com/SwordPuffin/Rewaita
Helix: Barely needs a config. But they are also pretty close to done with a plug-in system for the stuff that isn't implemented by default :D
Iirc, gnome also got a million from the Sovereign Tech Fund a while back (I think it was them + that amount of money, don't quote me on this).
Imo: both are good and deserve it. They sometimes have different ways of thinking and goals, but both are usible for everyone - even for non-techies.
While I'm a gnome fanboy, it's really cool to see financial support for good desktops!