Comradeship // Freechat

For those who didn’t know, I am a 29-year old gamer and college student. I was diagnosed with autism since early age.

I am very dependent on my pension and my aunt on my budget, however most of it went for food. So I have set this fundraising to help me cover college-related fees, free tuition couldn’t cover beyond intended purpose.

Today, I find myself in urgent need of support. Despite these overwhelming challenges, my determination remains unyielding. I believe in the power of kindness and empathy, which motivates me to reach out to you.

Ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/ahriboy

Please if you can spare anything, Thank you!

(For more information,questions, Or for any other ways to send donations/gift cards/etc. if any of the above options don’t work for you, please DM me!!!)

When the packet came in the mail, I saw the materials sticking out of the mail. Nothing looks tampered though, but I am still worried who opened the packet and why.

Title.

I think everyone should know that they are literal Nazis by now.

Fuck Gorgron and his gang

I "need" to write one (technically, no one is forcing me to, but I should because I've been a less than adequate communist IRL, as much as ill make excuses in my head [nothing horrible, im not a snitch or anything]) but I've never written one before.

Is there a standardized way or format of doing this? Or is it simply dependent on the person and the severity of their lapse? Should the focus be on the lapse or should it be on steps to rectify my behavior, or both? Should I attempt to explain why I acted in certain ways (not excusing them, but just explaining why I did what I did so I and others know what went wrong)? Should I not be asking this?

Is agitprop even worth it? I got 3 dislikes and a comment saying "I FOUND ONE" as if I'm some pokemon in under 5 minutes. What could have been done better to persuade more and spark genuine discussion? I'm new to agitprop, so any advice helps especially if it's coming from experience.

The video in question, it got sent to me by a coworker saying that they found it interesting. I have no idea what to think of, but calling the Lenin a dictator can't be right.

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DOwQ3apAcPz/

I keep finding myself torn between my mother who is attempting (and unbeknownst to her, failing) to indoctrinate me into Islam, and my father, a spiritualist (essentially a Gnostic but less Christian), who claims to be able to talk to, “higher dimensional beings”, and a reincarnation of Vishnu. Oh, and he’s a misogynist. You can’t make this shit up.

Anyway, my father has these conversations with me in private, that he can’t have in front of my mother; this encompasses things like religion (which he disagrees with), philosophy, and politics (the latter of which I shall get to in a bit). My mother does the same; she tells me stuff that she can’t say in front of my dad, which is mainly Islam. I pretend to agree to both of them, to save myself an argument with them (although both have on occasion said things I agree with).

My mother told me to tell her stuff that my dad talks about to me, which I, to an extent, honour, although I do omit some details.

Politically, my mother has some pretty anti-imperialist tendencies, whereas my father is more or less a crypto-fascist; he’s an anti-communist, an individualist, an anti-Semite, and has said things against illegal immigration, and, as I said earlier, a misogynist, saying that women are, “possessive” in positions of power.

As you can tell, my family dynamics are, complicated, to put it mildly.

For former socialists, there's one argument I see them use for why they are not socialist anymore.

That argument is that they felt guilty about wanting to push their ideology onto others and so they started believing in parliamentary politics again where every opinion is valuable. My dad who used to be an anarchist as a teenager used this reasoning, as well as one of my teachers.

But this argument doesn't make sense to me, because it makes politics into something which only revolves around opinions, while we communists and the capitalist class know it's about power.

I feel like these people never learned much about their ideology when they were socialists. I think I will never stop being a communist, I know too much.

Have you seen this reasoning yourself?

I notice this with people talking about capitalism, obviously, but honestly what drove me to make this post is the attempted arguments against veganism. They're basically 95% unoriginal and fail under the most basic of scrutiny.

Take, for example, "not eating the meat won't bring the cow back." Under basically any logical scrutiny, this is a clear double standard to any other purchasing decision in capitalist society, and doesn't really make any sense. But I've seen in so many times over the years, so much so that im planning on becoming a vegan over a period of time. Not because of any arguments vegans make, but because somehow pro-meat eaters are losing a debate to a brick wall, and the conclusions I've made myself have convinced myself that I should be vegan. And I'm really starting to ask, do people just...like...ctrl+c ctrl+v arguments in their head?

I...try to be nice. But...how little respect to your own ability do you have if you do that? Not only to justify something you really don't have to, but something you obviously dont care about. I mean...sorry, it's just baffling to me.

In the words of Kim Kitsuragi from disco elysium, "I dont understand officer...please, help me understand"

Examples are researches, articles from media, youtube videos, podcasts etc. how do I know that what the people in these media outlets are saying is true? Do I just take the information at face value or do I need to do some specific research?

I'm asking this as I've come to information in the past that was then contradicted by some other information (apparently). Especially when it comes to debate and I would say that there are documents that the CIA has staged coups all around the world, the other person can just say "show me the proof I don't believe you" and I'm just left standing there not knowing what to say or saying "saw it in a youtube video which showed the documents" which isn't much of an answer I feel like.

Hope this makes sense.

How do I get people to join? How do I radicalize people? What is done other than theory discussion?

Original post: https://www.facebook.com/LSVHXHCN/posts/pfbid03MAMaNdsgcq6enkv6YNDFb9obXqajHVZZqhiaXJkshLU1JTPSssHrt7UagKcbvCEl

Preface: I'm saying this as a first world prole, so I understand I'm not immune to this as well. I might spend $40 on an old book i want, which that $40 could be someone's monthly wage somewhere else. However, I do want to talk about this to someone who'll understand.

I like my streamers. Well, I like watching their YouTube videos anyway, and I was Watching DougDoug's charity event he held last year for the monterrey bay aquarium. There was one bit where another streamer (ludwig) gets into a bidding war with a viewer over essentially a backstage pass to the actual process of taking care of some of the sea creatures there. He spent $20000+ on it.

It wasn't necessarily just an absent minded purchase, he did make a big deal of it, but it wasn't something he was genuinely freaking out about. He essentially spent $20000 on a bit. [He was also donating to charity, but in comparison, I wouldnt spend probably over $2000 on charity over a year, if I was doing financially well].

So after this I Sat there and was just...jealous. Not of his lifestyle or his success or his business or whatever. But simply of his carefree nature about it. That spending $20000 on basically a joke was a "haha funni" moment and not a "What the fuck am I going to eat and where am I going to live" moment.

I also recently went on a Dr.Mike binge because I was sick (which honestly I feel like shit about because I already don't like him), and there was one video where he casually mentioned he has a bunch if super cars? Like what? I know those cars suck in terms of actual utility for normal people, but if I had one of those I wouldn't shut up to anyone. Those are the things I oggle at when I see them drive by, even if they're obviously rental cars.

Then I was Watching a yt shorts (I know I need to get off of those, but hey it's better than smoking so ill pick my battles) guy, who is a lawyer. And he was talking about this embarrassing bit where his elevator broke, and he needed the fire department had to come help, and when they entered all they found was a cigar dispenser [a "humidor." I didn't even know that was a thing]

I was obviously very confused. Isn't smoking outlawed in commercial buildings? How does he even regulate that who uses that? Wouldn't it be more convenient to have it in your office, if you're allowed to smoke for some reason?

Annndddd then it hit me. He has an elevator inside of his home. Like...what? I hadn't even considered the idea. Even the largest of mansions I had pictured didn't have elevators in them. And he just...has that?

None of this inspires me to want to be like these people. Ludwig I just generally don't like, and didn't really do well in trying to do anything besides streaming (as he admits, and i don't even know how much of that is just luck), Dr.Mike definitely doesn't have supercars because he's a doctor, and the last guy is a Bourgeois civil lawyer (I feel like I don't have to explain this one). All of these people got lucky in some way or another. So all I'm left with is a profound sense of jealousy.

I'm just sitting there imagining what $20000 would do for me, or how much less stressed I would be if I had the same money as all of these people. I don't need in house elevators or super cars or whatever, I just want a decent home, a lot of books, and a good computer. And these people just talk about it like they didn't hit the lottery of life, that they get to love comfortably, way more comfortably than 99% of people. And I know this is kinda moralizing, I know, I try to stay away from it. But it just builds up inside of me and overwhelms me.

"committed suicide by injecting cyanide into an apple" oh ffs who believes this shit

So irritated with people repeating the cover story. He was murdered by Military Intelligence and it's fucking blatant, stop letting them off the hook.

This has been an impromptu vent. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

As expected, my nausea is back like I knew it would be. I think I'm anxious about getting better because I feel like-

1. what does cured even look like? A month without symptoms? 6? a year for a year? How do you determine when you're good?
2. I also feel like I wouldn't be given the time to assess this myself. I don't know if it's just my impression, but I get the impression that if I announced to my doctor, case worker etc that I felt better, they would drop me and put me back to work ASAP without leaving me time to process and decide when I'm ready.

Regardless I went to breathe some fresh air this morning and then my brother came to talk to me, and that was enough to send me instantly. It was manageable, but it's definitely back lol.

Considering the timing and what happened before I had this 'good' period I'm inclined to think SIBO. This is basically bacterial overgrowth in the gut which leads to disorder. It can lead to temporary lactose intolerance which happened to me twice (that was fun to find out while I was having constant nausea lol), and in some cases it can also get better for up to a week.

Welp, I'm getting tested for SIBO in october so there's not much to do for it but wait.

The second interesting thing is that talking to my brother, he talked about his panic attacks he had some 15 years ago and I realized a lot of his triggers are basically the same as mine - including the cold. Previously I was seeing a psychiatrist and her opinion was that my symptoms were too 'strong' so to speak to be psychosomatic. But I don't know, I also got the feeling this was all a bit out of her depth. Apparently there is some supportive evidence that pulmonary embolisms can be caused by stress and anxiety/panic, and I was pretty stressed out around the time I got my PE. But I've never had a panic attack and I don't plan on starting haha.

Keep in mind, every specialist I see thinks my illness is one from their specialty, and then it turns out it's not.

A few months ago i made a couple posts talking about how I was basically constantly afraid of dying. Firstly, thanks for the good responses to those. But secondly, at the time I didn't know there was a phobia of death.

I'm going to talk to a therapist [at some point] and ask if I may have this, along with agoraphobia. I get fearing death is obviously normal, but considering i wake up every morning and think "oh my god I'm not dead" and then spend a few minutes being depressed about the inevitability of death before taking a shower [which i havent heard of people doing before tbh], I wouldn't be surprised if I did.

After spending the entire weekend dry heaving and being set off at the slightest stimulus, I started the week feeling like I haven't felt in over a year.

I'm now on day 4, starting since Monday, of feeling pretty good. Not completely fine, but better than I've been in, well, forever.

It's terrifying because I have no idea why that's happening. Nothing has changed but now my body decides that it's not as nauseous. Will this last? Won't it? I have no idea.

Part of it is fear of the unknown. After a year I got so used to having these symptoms that I forgot what it was like not to have them. It feels foreign.

Another part, and this is something I've shared with my doctor before, is that I would be pissed if I suddenly was cured and we never knew what happened. What would it mean for me? To spend an entire year -- more than a year actually -- disabled, unable to even leave the house or do chores, all medical exams coming back negative, only for it to go away for no reason? It doesn't feel fair. It would feel like I was cheated out of a year of my existence. I recently cancelled my gym membership. I told all my friends and family about the disability. I've had to reorganize my entire life over the past year.

Or is it the fear of being judged? The fear of people thinking that I wasn't really disabled, or that I was exaggerating, if I suddenly get better for no reason? That it wasn't "so" bad?

But it's day 4 of a good stretch that followed after a pretty bad stretch. I still take it easy but it doesn't take a degree to realize that I am currently feeling much better. It's weird, but I want the symptoms back. They feel like home.

Here's an article about a woman in a wheelchair who had some random man tell her having a disabled toilet is a "perk." Seems like a better perk would be being able bodied. It just reminded me of all the times since having to quit work since getting cancer and having a stroke that people have said things to me like "At least you don't have to work for your money," or "It must be nice getting free money."

Yeah it's lovely being in constant pain, being ill all the time, having all my hopes and dreams go down the drain, becoming totally isolated as people just drift away once you become ill, living off a pittance when in receipt of benefits and having to beg for every little thing when that pittance gets cut off, and getting reassessed for that pittance constantly. Not being able to do the things you want, just waiting to die. But hey, at least I get the disabled people's "perks" like disabled toilets.

cross-posted from: https://hexbear.net/post/6086675

https://www.gofundme.com/f/surviving-an-onslaught

cross-posted from: https://hexbear.net/post/6081487

My name is Soliman, a young student from Gaza.

For months, my family and I have been displaced, living without a safe home, without stability, and with the constant fear of tomorrow.

We once had a small farm with olive and citrus trees. It wasn’t just our source of income — it was a place full of dreams and memories. Today, it is gone, and survival has become our only daily goal.

As the eldest son, I carry the responsibility of caring for my siblings and family. Winter has made life even harder — we face the cold without proper shelter or clothes. Every day is a struggle to meet the most basic needs.

I am reaching out with hope that kind people will hear our story and help us survive these harsh times. Even a small donation can mean food, warmth, or a safe roof over our heads.

👉 Please support us through this campaign:

https://www.gofundme.com/f/surviving-an-onslaught

From Gaza, thank you for reading, caring, and sharing. Your kindness gives us hope for tomorrow.

I wonder if people are maybe finding the supermarket gift cards too difficult? I had hoped to never have to ask for help via paypal again as I'm getting closer to the time of my disability benefit appeal and if I win they can check the previous 6 months of my bank accounts and will question anything coming in. However the situation is getting dire and I don't know what else to do. I'm reposting my previous request, but with paypal added in case anyone wants to help but finds the gift cards too difficult.

Repost:

I’m disabled, having thyroid cancer treatment that caused me to have a stroke and at my last assessment, my disability benefits got stopped (very normal in the UK). I’m going through appeal. The food bank takes weeks to access and only gives a small amount of tea, coffee, milk, sugar and some junk food like cookies. I’ve been getting help on mutual aid and comradeship/freechat to get food but it’s getting more and more difficult to get a response.

The prevailing view of society is that since I no longer work, I no longer deserve to eat. Another sick aspect of this is that if I win my appeal, they’ll check my bank account and I’ll have to explain any incoming money to them, and receiving could potentially get me in trouble (they just expect me to live on thin air in the meantime), so it’s safer for me to get food vouchers rather than money but I’m desperate enough to accept anything at this point.

If anyone can help, please send a supermarket gift card to my email address: DisabledAceSocialist@hotmail.com

This one takes credit, debit and google pay:

https://www.sainsburysgiftcard.co.uk/

This one takes crypto:

https://www.bitrefill.com/gb/en/gift-cards/sainsburys-in-store-digital-uk/

I am really grateful for any help.