The Deprogram Podcast

I don't believe in the male loneliness epidemic.

Whenever i hear this issue being talked about i feel it is not so much about loneliness but about the lack of a healthy identity archetype for men.

Masculinity has so much baggage behind it; in the structure of capitalism, traditional chauvinism, abuse of power, Etc. That it has become somewhat a mark of shame. Even the right winger nuts speak about masculinity not in a way that embraces any positive traits, but indulging in every abusive excess. "we are evil men and proud. " they say with their actions.

So if masculinity has become a negative even to it's right wing extremist “defenders“ does it mean that the only accepted masculinity is one that is considered to go against any male paradigm? Are there positive male traits? Is evil in the balls like they say?

And another one, if some male traits are biological, and some are cultural, how do we handle male traits that are a result testosterone, chemistry, hormones. When in college, I dated a trans guy through his transition and beyond, and he changed in substantial ways. To him those changes were a reason to celebrate:

Beyond the initial horniness and brashness of the "second puberty" we noticed his sexuality shifted towards being more assertive. In personality he did become a little less emotional a bit more of a risk taker. His body changed a lot. Through gym work he gained size and looking more masculine also gave him a sense of agency he didn't have before. (I have a little obsession with the body and how chemistry changes us so going to the gym with him was an eye opener to the potency of hormones.)

For the first time i felt this guy might have power over me, i never said it but he felt it too and our relationship had a little shift.

So lets say that testosterone can be physical power over others, that testosterone can have certain effects over an individual a personality and the way we relate to it. If we remove capitalism and all conceptions of gender, wouldn't those notions remain "masculine"? and at that point wouldn't we have to construct and accept some traits that form a positive masculine identity?

This topic is large and full of contradictions, like how most right wing defenders of chauvinism and incels are not traditionally masculine themselves. I always wonder how would these guys would feel if they gained access to my ex boyfriends' T.

About how the right has capitalized on this confusion, (provide solutions to the mental issues their system created.)

And finally I'm not sure what would be the leftist analysis of this feeling of joy and power, (gender euphoria?) my ex boyfriend felt when he gained a little muscle. "stepping up in the ladder of masculine identity;" which i am not sure if that hierarchical way of thinking is part of the structural problem itself.