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I my experience, the oldest child is forced to mature faster by being required to perform childcare duties, especially in families with many children.
Younger siblings basically "get to be a kid" longer than older ones.
This is unfair to both older and younger siblings for a myriad of reasons, but both are a failure of parenting, and society as a whole. The parents should not be forcing the dynamic, and society should not be putting parents in a position where they feel they have to.
As for "feeling immature" as an adult... That is entirely dependent on what you measure maturity by. My wife and I sing nonsense tunes at each other, sometimes just look up and go "QUACK!" for no reason. We have gone to a playground to go swinging. We have gone outside to play in the snow.
I didn't get my first job without my mother's help until 20. I didn't get my license until 26. I didn't get my first full time job until 33. I absolutely hate going to a store at all, let alone by myself. Although if I'm being honest I would rather go by myself since it's faster and less chance of my wife grabbing 10 extra things because we passed the aisle and she went something snack-y.
Remember, "Autism Spectrum Disorder" is, as the name implies, a spectrum. As such everyone is on it. Most people are gathered in a general area area (the people who would be considered "normal" by someone who has a more traditional old way of thinking) I personally believe I'm a little further toward the "autism" side, based on a bunch of comparing my personal experience with others who are diagnosed. I don't believe it's that big a deal for me, as I am fully capable of functioning on my own as an adult.
A bit of armchair psychology, I'd wager you're a bit like my wife and due to narcissistic and withholding parents you likely need more reassurance than the average person. This isn't a failure on your part at all, and it's not a "developmental disability" it's just a bit of childhood trauma.
To answer more directly:
In my opinion, yes eldest siblings often mature faster. Feeling immature is probably normal, and maturity is a pretty vague notion in general. ASD in general isn't as big a deal as many people think. If you'll forgive me for saying so, your family kind of sucks.
Oh... lol... yeah I remember...
My older brother got so annoyed that mom told him to pick me up from school...
I mean I remember somtimes I felt like: yay, my big bro like the feeling of brotherhood felt so great at times... then sometimes fightings happen and then the next day it's like a cold war... like I felt like: oh no, he's gonna beat me up
Like sometimes mom had arguments with him and he got mad at me because mom delegated the task for having to pick me up from school.
I sometimes felt so scared at all the arguing and I cry in my room...
oh yea I wonder why I can't grown up... ๐ซ such a mystery