this post was submitted on 10 Jun 2026
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I've realized I'm a very atypical person: talking to coworkers in my age range today I realized they have a better financial situation than mine: they are married, some with children, own their own condos, houses, or are paying a mortgage, but can still live a normal life, own a car, some even have the luxury of not having to work 40 hours a week, but 32 because they don't need to work more, house already paid, family and life objectives achieved.

Me: I'm 43, I don't own but rent, meaning I pay for something I'm never going to own. The last 2 years I've been saving like crazy because I'm afraid of not having enough money for retirement, and because in my past I did so much stupid shit, meaning I wasted so many years not doing anything of use.

I have around 100K in the bank, I know I should invest but I'm also scared of losing that money and I don't know if I should use that money as a down payment for a house.

My father owns 3 houses and I envy him. I've been thinking about asking him to sell one of the houses and give me the proceeds so I can buy my own place because some of my coworkers did that and could finance their own home. When my father went to study to another state my grandfather bought him a house there so he wouldn't have to rent. When he moved back to home state he sold and invested the money to buy a new house there. He had way easier than me. It's not fair. I feel... unloved?

I guess this makes me an entitled ass but I feel so... lost?

To summarize, I feel like a loser because I'm old, I'm behind most of my coworkers my age, I'm a very individualistic person but this means I'm going to die alone, but sometimes I feel alone and scared of being old and alone. I don't own anything of value to my name, it's like I'm an old teenager.

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[โ€“] yenahmik@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

Having $100k stashed away is great! Check out the book "A Simple Path to Wealth" by JL Colllins for investment advice.

I'd recommend you stop comparing yourself to others and focus on what you want in life. You say you don't know if you should use your savings as a down payment for a house or not, but do you even want to own a house? Homeownership is very much a lifestyle choice. With rent, that is the maximum you will have to pay. Your mortgage is just the bare minimum. If I was single, I would not want to live in a house. I would either rent or potentially buy a condo.

You say your an individualist but are scared of being alone. What are you doing to build relationships (romantic or not) and community?