I got the sense that he was a great dad...he was just in deep with the fire nation propaganda. Lu Ten's death snapped him out of it so much he abandoned his place in succession, yielding it to his younger brother. Not having an heir of his own kinda made the choice a bit easier.

I got the impression that he took Zuko under his wing because he wanted to get a second shot, knowing that losing his son to the war wasn't worth it. Zuko, before the exile, was the rightful heir to the throne. I think his spiritual awakening made him realize that de-brainwashing Zuko was the only way to restore order. He even explained, before Sozins Comet, that Zuko has to take the throne. It can't be him, because that would ruin any chance of stability...regime change coming from the fire lords brother killing or arresting Ozai would spark huge division among top brass.

I also thing most of the fire nation commoners...especially non-benders, knew deep down they were the baddies and were just trying to keep a low profile and survive. The kids kinda bought the propaganda from the schools but the parents would break that spell when the kid was old enough to understand. It kinda feels...relatable...as a parent of a kid who dislikes Columbus and pilgrims, and who rants around them of how history shafted Malcom but propped King up on a pedestal. They were equal parts responsible for the civil rights movement. Malcom was "plan B". "The man" liked Plan A more. And for good reason. But Plan A wouldn't have amounted to shit if Plan B weren't on the table.