this post was submitted on 04 Aug 2026
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[–] Triumph@fedia.io 211 points 2 months ago (8 children)

I have never understood the need to comment on porn of any kind.

[–] Zak@lemmy.world 161 points 2 months ago (3 children)

You probably also guessed that the stripper isn't actually attracted to you.

[–] Triumph@fedia.io 95 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 52 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Sorry you had to find out this way.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)

But the escort actually likes me, right?

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 30 points 2 months ago (2 children)
[–] jim3692@discuss.online 20 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Instructions unclear. My ford escort definitely hates me

[–] ByteJunk@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I'd hate you too if you were trying to clog up my tailpipe.

[–] mattyroses@lemmy.today 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

you need to focus! It's not time for a fiesta!

[–] ByteJunk@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

That's a joke I cannot afford to make...

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I made her a loaf of sourdough bread and now I know her real name and home address. Did I mess up?

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Idk depends on your next move methinks

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Do you think it would turn out the same way as that one time I married the stripper?

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago

So a twenty-year marriage and a mortgage, got it

[–] orbituary@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 2 months ago (3 children)

I don't need attraction, just the illusion thereof.

[–] slacktoid@lemmy.ml 11 points 2 months ago

Maybe that's what's happening here too, the illusion of a pretty lady

[–] MangoCats@feddit.it 2 points 2 months ago

Our neighbor the beat cop always said: "in the end, all they want is the right kind of friction."

[–] UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml 1 points 2 months ago

I dont need my porn to be this realistic. I want some fantasy to.

[–] jtrek@startrek.website 44 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I've seen some funny comments, but the ones that are like "ur so hot" are baffling.

[–] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Also the "if you had to pick one" ones. Like it's a public forum and those are real people. Like I get the whole fantasy and thinking about which one you are most attracted to, but any kind of bonding with others around porn (that isn't just having sex while watching porn) just seems pathetic to me.

[–] dil@piefed.zip 5 points 2 months ago

I used to think about pornstar id marry when I was like 11, they have kid me discoverng porn for the first time logic

[–] andrewrgross@slrpnk.net 35 points 2 months ago (2 children)

It's a parasocial dopamine hit. It's like commenting on a Twitch stream. There's a fantasy that they'll notice and reply to you, and suddenly you'll be having a conversation with a famous attractive person.

[–] athairmor@lemmy.world 17 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Sometimes, I think it’s like people yelling at someone in a horror movie “he’s right behind you!”

It prompts real feelings and reactions and they just have to let them out.

[–] UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml 10 points 2 months ago

Interesting take, thanks for sharing. No sarcasm.

[–] Triumph@fedia.io 14 points 2 months ago

Ah so the same people who buy lottery tickets.

[–] frongt@lemmy.zip 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Identifying the performer to find more of their material, or more of the same genre

[–] DokPsy@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)

This wouldn't be necessary if more of the Internet used AO3 tagging and category systems

[–] Funkt4st1c@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

Ive been begging us to adopt booru-style tagging for videos for decades at this point.

(For the uninitiated, this would mean i could search something like "Brunette curly_hair -horse_penis score:>500" and get every video known to man with a curly haired brunette who does not interact with a horse penis and at least 500 people liked the video)

[–] KingThrillgore@lemmy.ml 4 points 2 months ago

We never would have gotten such gems as "give her the dick" without them

[–] Cethin@lemmy.zip 2 points 2 months ago

I commented on one porn post here on Lemmy where the person was trying to look way too young. I commented in a reply to another comment that was saying it's kind of disgusting and wrong, because the intent is clear that they were trying to at least appear like a child. It doesn't really matter if they're actually of-age. It's like anime with the thousand year old dragon gir thing. If you're trying to create something erotic/pornographic while appearing like a child, that content doesn't need to exist.

That is I think the only time I've posted on porn.

[–] Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I've posted a few asking why they decided a macro shot of the dude's butthole was what we wanted to see.

[–] Triumph@fedia.io 6 points 2 months ago

Speak for yourself.

[–] RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago

Because the posts try to make it sound like they're private messages to you, and men reply in a thread with hundreds of others all leaving the same comment.