Ask Lemmy
A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions
Rules: (interactive)
1) Be nice and; have fun
Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, toxicity and dog-whistling are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them
2) All posts must end with a '?'
This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?
3) No spam
Please do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.
4) NSFW is okay, within reason
Just remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com.
NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].
5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions.
If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.
6) No US Politics.
Please don't post about current US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world or !uspolitics@lemmy.world
7) No Hit-and-Run questions.
Please don't delete your post for no apparent reason. If you plan on deleting a question later, say so in the post, or if you feel that you have a good reason to remove it, message a mod beforehand. It's not fair to the ones who took their time to answer, and it's not in the spirit of the community.
8) No Bots.
Posts or comments from bots, LLM's, AIs, Neural Networks, Transformers, or Marvin the Paranoid Android are not welcome in AskLemmy. Real humans only please.
Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.
Partnered Communities:
Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu
view the rest of the comments
Discipline/self control. I don't need to worry so much about the self control in that way, I'm a very chilled guy. I only really give into the intrusive thoughts when I'm cooking food, or saying something I think is funny but turns out to just be offensive.
The discipline I struggle with. I don't understand how people seem to have enough hours in the day to keep a tidy home, study a course in the evening, do a tiktok channel as an attempt at a side hustle, 40 hours a week at work, cook a full dinner every evening for family etc etc etc.
Sometimes, like once or twice a month, the stars will align and I will be on it, but I can't just be that guy on demand.
Those people that seem to do that, how many are they? How many are there that don't/can't do that? Or more specially, what is the share of people that have such a busy live? Do you perhaps simply only see those outliers and all the normal/average people are not like that but you simply don't see it?
I do wonder if theres some sort of presentation bias or something. Ive only seen 2 homes that are worse than mine in my whole life, but I'm not sure people with unkept houses are big on having visitors.
The standard was set by households that had domestic servants. Either actual rich people or southern whites exploiting low wage black women and girls.
It was maintained for a time in the 1950s with drugs. Alcoholism was rampant, and tranquilizers for women. Miltab, mommies little helpers. You can see this in media well into the 90s with vicodin, Lexapro.
Drug yourself into a haze and you can do it. You won't have time for a social life.
The point is it's not a realistic standard. Live communaly and it starts to work better. Otherwise give yourself grace.
This. All of this.