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It sounds to me like you already are doing plenty of things or planning to, so I'll tell you something that was said to me by a therapist once:
It sounds like you're looking at your self worth conditionally. You need to do X, then you'll be Y. The thing is, that's a journey with no end. You'll always find something else you don't have if you think of yourself this way.
You need to work on unconditional self worth. How can you give yourself grace on the days when you just sit around and watch YouTube videos? Are you really worthless if you never learn an instrument?
This may not vibe with you, but one technique I've been told is to think of your child self. Imagine this little girl or boy you used to be standing in front of you. They feel horrible because they haven't done this or that. Would you chastise them for it? Or would you pick them up and give them a hug? They're trying, and that's what matters, even if they don't get exactly where they want in the end.
So to sum it up, your self worth is conditional, and you need to find ways to treat yourself well more unconditionally. The more you can do that, the more confident you'll feel, regardless of what else is happening in life.
Best of luck with this. I have struggled with similar things and still do sometimes. It takes work to change your thinking, and it won't be linear gains.
Thats a great way to word that, I've had this bouncing around in my head but not sure how to explain until now.
I was going to say something about how I have been figuring out recently how if I just give myself leeway and do actually spend the day playing a game or whatever then I find that later in the day I'm in a much better mood than before because I didn't spend the whole day ruminating on the fact that I'm choosing to game over doing productive things...makes me think that I need to just spend some couple days completing doing nothing in order to reset, like a meditation day or whatever because i have apparently become so lost that I thought my default was supposed to be ruminating about not feeling ok enough to do various things even though other days when I basically mentally prep for it if an spend the whole day doing a bunch if things but not be able to fully wind down enough at the end.
I think I mentally have the right mindset but I just become lost in the weeds or whatever.
I really relate to that. I also find it really hard to give myself permission to rest and unwind. There's a lot of guilt in there for me about not being productive enough.
I had to start working on it when I burnt out hard earlier this year though.