this post was submitted on 02 Nov 2026
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Not a date so much as a "hookup". We hung out for a bit, went to my place, and hung out on the bed for a while. Eventually we started making out, and things escalated. I got literally two strokes in when she told me to stop. Okay, fair enough, consent is always revocable, it's fine.
So we're back to sitting in the bed and talking, and ten minutes later she's back on top of me, kissing even more passionately than before. Escalation again, I confirm that she wants me to put it in, and three strokes later she tells me to stop again. Okay, consent is still revocable but this is getting ridiculous.
We go through this cycle two or three more times, each time confirming consent, each time only getting a couple thrusts in before she tells me to stop. That combined with the vast swings between doting and negging just rubbed me the wrong way. She was so hot-and-cold that I felt like she was fucking with me on purpose.
I did not call her back.
It's been a minute since I read a story that screamed "personality disorder" more loudly than that. Sorry you had to deal with it, glad you stayed patient and walked away calmly. Sounds like she was trying to bait you into something.
I've had one of those. She was fresh from a breakup and I think was looking to punish someone. I even offered to go sleep in another hotel but she called me back to bed. I think she did like me, but was working some things out without really knowing it. Smoking hot though, easily the sexiest woman I've ever been with
I imagine there's a bit of a correlation.
One, being smoking hot takes time and effort (hair, makeup, skincare, fitness, etc.), and some inherent degree of vanity. There's nothing wrong with taking care of yourself and taking a basic level of pride and dignity in your appearance, but at a certain level it becomes obsessive.
Two, even if you're just naturally hot, you were probably always very attractive. People tend to be nicer to hot people and tolerate their bullshit way more. Without the natural pushback of being called out for emotional overstepping, there's no pressure for maturation. It's kinda like the trees grown in that biodome that collapsed under their own weight, because there wasn't any wind to strain and strengthen them.
I'm definitely not saying hot = emotionally unstable, I know plenty of very attractive and stable women. It's not universal. But the most self-obsessed and emotionally volatile women I've known have usually been very hot.
Yeah. I met her abroad in a fancy part of San Diego. Making huge sweeping assumptions here, but everyone there was just oozing self-importance. I felt a bit like I was in a zoo, and interacting with very well groomed fauna.
That is to say, I think her behaviour wasn't atypical of the area she lived in, from my somewhat judgemental lens