this post was submitted on 08 Nov 2026
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I've been maybe 5 or 6 times for a few days but once stayed at my then girlfriend's place in NYC for a month. She lived in latin harlem.
I vividly recall one of my first mornings there. My then gf asked me to get some bagels and vegetable cream cheese for breakfast. I went outside the apt building and found the first bodega around the corner.
There was a hispanic man with a mustache and a half-unbuttoned shirt leaning behind the counter and displaying an abundance of thick black chest hair. There was a radio on that was describing some kind of sports event in audio quality so bad I couldn't even tell the language. A few feet in front of the counter, there was a thin middle aged black fellow with a huge grin on his face and sunglasses, just leaning on one of the isles and doing nothing. It didn't seem like he was listening to the radio or interacting with the other guy in any way. I walked inside, said hi and went to get the bagels. The hispanic man ignored me, but the black dude said "how's it goin?" in a very slick raspy voice. I was like "hey". He kept looking at me, smiling, as I went in.
I went looking for the veg cheese but they didn't seem to have any, so I approached the counter and asked chest hair guy "do you have any vegetable cream cheese?" to which he did not react to or establish eye contact.
The black guy, however asked me "vegetable cream chEESE???", holding his huge grin, and I'm like "yeah...?". He then asks me "You a vegetarian?" without losing his smile. I just try to say "n-no.." but before I could finish, he literally yells at me, still grinning: "YA GOTTA EAT SOME MEAT, SON. YA GOTTA EAT SOME MEAT!" he then turns around to counter guy and says "Sheeeeiii" who acknowledges this with eye contact.
Then counter guy just reached out extending his hand without saying anything but clearly conveying he just wanted me to buy what I had and not interact with him in any other way. I just grabbed the regular cream cheese, paid for everything and walked out.
As I was leaving, grin guy says "see ya latah" in his sexy raspy voice.
It was the single greatest New York experience of my entire life.