this post was submitted on 10 Aug 2025
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This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.

I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.

I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.

Its tough.

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[–] HyonoKo@lemmy.ml 18 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

Been there done that. You never, ever know what’s the story behind a beggar. If I have and feel like it and I’m not in a rush I give. This is a fucked up world.

[–] ameancow@lemmy.world 1 points 5 hours ago* (last edited 5 hours ago)

There was a time in my adult life that I was stealing water from a construction site so I could care for my ill partner after losing work and family members. I did claw out and found new work and a whole new life, but I was down that far and worse and you wouldn't know it by looking at me now. I'm sure I was more than dirty at the time from having to walk everywhere. I uber'd a lot, but you can't do that every day.

I came very close to asking strangers for help. I guess I did to some degree, I did ask for help on online forums specifically for that purpose, got very little response... but why does that seem "better" to so many people? Is it the eye-contact with someone you could become? Is it fear that you don't feel the sympathy you think you should if you look at them?

Is it harder to smile at a poor or homeless person than someone getting out of their nice car? Why or why not?

These are all better questions that readers should ask themselves than try to answer here for the reactions of strangers. We really don't ponder enough and it's breaking everything at the seams.