We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!
Posts must be:
Please also avoid duplicates.
Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, ableist, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.
And that’s basically it!
"Once again the investor with the cheesiest portfolio comes out on top!"
eats cheese
"Oh no! I'm ruined!"
Can't we solve this problem like Elon would solve the problem and simply store the cheese in space?
The moon isn't made of cheese ... yet!
Honestly storing cheese in space makes more sense than putting data centers in space
Due to orbital decay, it ends up raining fondue. It's a huge mess.
You're right. We'd better store different cheeses together with some white wine, an assortment of spices and a bit of Kirschwasser. If it's going to be raining fondue, we may as well do it in style!
I'd watch that as a gritty sci fi comedy
I want quicker access to cheese than space.
Only after announcing the cheese will be on Mars next year. Every year
"The first cheese to reach Mars!"
Much government cheese is stored in "Missouri cheese caves",[10] underground warehouses for storing and aging cheese in and around the Midwestern state of Missouri, part of a national network of such facilities.[11] An erroneous article by Modern Farmer began circulating on social media in 2022 implying all of the USDA's 1.5 billion pounds of cheese was stored in caves near Springfield, Missouri.[12][13]
The US has it too.
I know where I'm going when the zombie apocalypse hits.
Enjoy your constipation!
Imagine exploring some caves and just wandering into one of these vaults...
I think I know what the players in my D&D campaign will be wandering into next. Complete with cheese golems shaped like cows.
"I try to eat the cheese golem's head."
"Roll D20 for agility check."
*natural one*
"The golem is amused as it easily pulls away before you can sink your teeth into it, all you manage to chew on is your own hand and dignity. Roll D6 for finger damage and then golem attacks."
I want a cheese cave...
Very interesting !
Don't worry folks, the bank is not literally made of cheese. Their source uses a less oniony headline: https://www.euronews.com/business/2026/08/11/extreme-heat-strains-italys-cheese-banks-where-parmigiano-backs-farm-loans
A single round of Parmagiano is $2000.
More like $20k!
Haha!
Bilbo! Another round of cheese for Thorin's Dustr!
It was a play on words.
round - a drink of liquor apiece served at one time to each person in a group
and
the fact that dwarves are prodigiously hungry and thirsty
gives us:
They would each require their own round of cheese for a round served to the group, which is what Thorin called to be delivered to the table. Hence the price tag.
But thank you for the earnest education on delicious cheese. The pungent, well aged cheeses have always been my favorite.
But there were 13 dwarves...plus Bilbo and Gandolf.
I'm a big time nerd and your joke was too nerdy for me, that's really something!