Ask Lemmy

Probably curious about why I, an atheist, have the Book of Mormon, the Catholic Apocrypha, the Books of Enoch, the Quran, and the standard Bible along with my collection of books on energy healing and astrology.

A military medal that was awarded to me.

I have never been a member of any nation’s armed forces.

Weirdest for sure would be the contents of my journals. For a while during and after the pandemic I wrote a lot of entries very altered and I've also written a lot of entries at the top of some pretty spectacular manic episodes and the bottom of some very dark holes. I can't read them myself because they make me seem quite insane.

Most unexplainable would be a 50 alliance credit note from the Firefly/Serenity universe. They were produced by a gaggle of nerds and exact down to the paper, which is a semi-transparent nylon blend. I was given 300 credits in mixed bills as a joke from someone I had a one night stand with as payment for services rendered, but I've given them out to various fans of the show I've met over the 20 or so years they've been in my possession. If you weren't a mega fan of the show though, they would look like money from some obscure Asian country.

In my desk drawer is a small, plastic black box. Emerging from its surface is a toggle switch, some lights and wires that end in alligator clips. There is no writing at all, inside or out, It starts blinking lights and making an ominous buzzing sound if you let the wires touch each other while it's turned on. I built it myself, and you've got no hope of figuring out what it's for if you don't know already.

The massive horse dildo may be a bit of an head scratcher, though knowing me - maybe not that surprising thing to find.

I have a collection of Quack medical devices from the early 1900s. Some of them are used now as electrostatic sex toys.

Check the bottom of your desk if you like a good shag sitting by it.

Nice try, CIA guy, how about you come on down and see it for yourself if you really must know.

My family probably wouldn't be surprised about anything I own. They know the kind of guy I am.

A stranger might be a bit concerned about a certain wooden chest in my dining room. Large enough to fit an adult man (yes, we tried) but filled to the brim with swords, axes, pieces of armor and a 3 foot wooden spoon.

Edit: second place to a glittery pink princess themed friendship book filled with entries from adult millennials who like retro games, horror movies and metal.

Hmmm. Probably a (real) human spine (not my own).

A wicker elephant

Remember that one really dark hentai that became a meme, "Emergence" or "Metamorphosis?"

I got the bright idea to get a paperback copy of it and now it's just waiting for some catastrophe to unearth it from its hiding place, like a time capsule of bad decisions

The few dozen communist books I have

A tiny clay penis made by my best friend years ago.

I drew some pornographic stuff but the surprising part is how wholesome it is. I usually come off as jaded or cynical