This is all you need
this post was submitted on 17 Oct 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost
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god has smiled upon me
Wombat?
Batwom
Batwho?
Batyou!
Batme?
Chimkin nuget
good to know
You will be struck by a meteor, but you can avoid this fate by renouncing the evils of genAI and divorcing somebody. It doesnt have to be your own partner.
Origin story on becoming a notary.
All your actions can do is delay the inevitable or make it worse. Within the next 5==-4.;;; hours, you will still be alive, but you will have taken a shit. Good luck dear reader, for you
My dog will find you and lick your face when you least expect it.
50 years from now the dog shows up like poppins in always sunny and gets them some kisses
One day you will die.
And instead of saying all of your goodbyes, let them know
You realize that life goes fast
It's hard to make the good things last
You realize the sun doesn't go down
It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning
'round
no
Don't mind someone's criticism if you wouldn't take their advice.
You should know we've been trying to reach you for some time about your car's extended warrant. To avoid this fate please locate the reset button in your simulated reality, press and hold for three seconds before stating the shape the rebooted environment will take and release the button. It's very important that you do not flig the loompture or woogle the sauren. Normal service should resume after the universe reboots.
L
O
is it me you're looking for?
V
E
S
E
K
you will die in WWIII by an armed drone, the video of your death will be posed to reddit and receive 13 upvotes and 2 bot comments.
neat
TV and the internet will be replaced by one thing that is worse than both combined
I believe
Not matter where go, there you are.
You will be doomed to take a false constructed reality as objective. The bourgeoisie shall use this mistake to control you, feeding you lies. You will not realise that your ontology is built on capitalist lies, for you will not question the axioms upon which your worldview rests.
neat
Check back later.
OK its later now
Outlook not so good
Outlook (New) not so good either.
Death. As any mortal shall know. You will grow to learn the weary aches of age. You will grow to know the aches of watching an ignorant people repeatedly stab themselves in the foot. You will know the pain of dying alone.
meh
Thou shall have ze beans
rejoyce
Mindfulness and equanimity.
gay