Ask Lemmy

Most outrageous / unbelievable lies

Jesus is god

Most offensive / dangerous lies

Republicans want what is best for the country too. The world / USA fought the Nazis because of how evil they are
The KKK / Neonazis / White Supremacists are in the past.

Most “adult meant it as genuine advice but it’s laughably out of touch” lies

Work hard and stay loyal and you will progress in your career.

Lies you wish you still believed

Uncle ... is just old-fashioned.

Lies you took as truth and didn’t question it until you were way too old

The ultra wealthy work so hard to create jobs for everyone else

My sister had a practical joke to use on her daughter. When she was only a toddler, she kept saying in conversation that Jessica Simpson was OJ Simpson's daughter. Not all the time, just when it came up. We all thought it was hilarious, and it's pretty minor. The idea is that one day, her daughter will say it to someone else and get corrected.

Then the ease of fact checking that online made it impractical.

Then someone we never counted on - that daughter, being in high school, didn't know or care about either of those people. They don't come up in ANY conversations between high school kids. Or even us, at that point. One day, my sister brought it up and the kid goes "who?" And it dawned on her that it would never pay off. She told her and it was just an awkward silence followed by "um, ok?" Or something like that.

I guess the joke is on my sister for getting old?

Not me, but my partner’s: just walk around handing out your cv and if your handshake is good you’ll have a job by next week. During the 2008 recession. Yeah… sure…

Bumblebees don’t sting.

I have to give mom a pass for this one, though. The bumblebees in our yard were huge. It kept me from freaking out, which was probably for the best. Unfortunately, I believed it into my 40s, and repeated it a few times.

Dogs get diarrhea if you pull their tails.

Good diet and exercise will keep you healthy.

"Trans people are just gay men who are willing to become women to sleep with more men." From my mother who had a bachelor's degree in biology.

Not only incredibly transmisogynistic, but also confused me a lot as a transmasc kid hitting puberty and wondering why my body suddenly felt very, very wrong in ways beyond the norm.

My mom used to say that if I didn't eat soup I'd get a hole in my stomach

Things can only get better.

When I was between 10-12 years old, I attended a family celebration at my grandparents' house. I walked into one of the side rooms where my uncle was chilling by himself on a couch, and I noticed something shiny in the upper corner of the window. I took a closer look and found a wad of aluminum foil smashed into the corner against the window pane and it was somehow affixed there. I pointed to it and asked my uncle what the purpose of it was. He replied, "Papa and Nana believe in aliens. They put that up there so if an alien ship fires a laser at the house, it'll reflect back at the ship." And for some reason, I just believed his sarcastic nonsense. I believed my grandparents were alien fanatics well into my teens.

I spent years wondering about the mystery behind the Bermuda triangle. What could it possibly be? Aliens?? Dinosaurs???

Turns out it all was just a hoax.

used to take me to church twice a week, so there is that

My parents told me when I was a kid "If you light the spray from a can of WD40 to make a flamethrower, the fumes will make you wet your pants."

My parents were just trying to keep me from playing with fire.