Ask Lemmy

You're free to look at my door from the outside.

I'm home now, but if someone is going to give me a 10 minute warning, I won't be when they get here.

You said 10 minutes. Give me back that 1 second.

I'll show you how to install Archlinux

Almost everyone in this thread is a terrible host, Jesus Christ.

Sorry, OP.

I'll be naked when you get here. I think I have a strip of bacon left and can make some more French Toast.

You can hang out in the back yard and hand-feed our 100+ pound giant sulcata tortoise. She'll come "running" if she sees you have treats (e.g. lettuce).

You can keep the puppy busy outside so she doesn't have to worry about "forgetting" and doing that inside (puppies are trouble).

You can fish off the dock or swim in the pool. At night, I can setup the projection screen and we can watch some old movie out back and roast marshmallows at the fire pit.

Or you can just hang out with me in my garage/office and lose endless amounts of time watching the 3D printer print something (as is tradition with 3D printing!).

Also have a rather large robot to play with and an awesome HTPC setup and wifi 7 with 2 gig Internet. Actually, forget all that other stuff; 2 gig Internet is living the dream! 🤣

I send you up to the roof. You help the roofers there. Nothing beats some honest work with your hands.

Have you heard about our lord and saviour Jesus Christ?

id try to suck your dick immediately

Board games.

I have a cat that refuses to shut up. Ask him anything, he will scream at you. He will only stop if you ask him about Israel. Sometimes.

i'm gonna infect you with covid stay away

You have a choice. We can watch Ninja Turtles, read Ninja Turtles, or play Ninja Turtles.

Your premise falsely assumes I'll even let you in when you show up uninvited.

You can watch me practice and fuck up the same riff for 3 hours straight if you want

You can go clean some dishes?

We can play lego LOTR on my PC I have 2 controllers.

Coffee and conversation, like normal people?

well im currently naked.

Gotchu Bro/Sister:

Wife's already got Fellowship of the Ring Extended (of COURSE) ultraHD in the player.

I'll pop us some popcorn, and gladly point out all the fun trivia, like how when Aragorn kicks the helmet in Two Towers it was so legit because the actor ACTUALLY BROKE HIS TOE.

Why did I mention Two Towers when Fellowship is in the player? Heh. . .you didn't think we were stopping after Fellowship, did you?

The doors are already locked and planned bathroom / snack retrieval breaks are posted on the wall.

Pshhh.. I kinda live in the middle of nowhere, so I dunno.. wanna go try to catch some grass snakes by the swamp?

You’re gonna help me clean this place up for a bit, then we can chill afterwards. I don’t know what interests you, but I’m never bored at home so I think we’ll find something to do.

Hope ya like weed

Laser pointer

You can have a cup of tea, I'll put on a Beethoven record, and then you can untangle and sort all the stuff in my big box full of old cables, chargers, components, and adapters. If you find a micro usb cable you can have a cookie.

I'm going to work

But you can help yourself to my gaming PC.

I will leave you in suspense on if I will open the door.

Ask you to help carry my old stove out to the curb and see if you want to troubleshooot some wiring

I have an induction forge and an induction smelting crucible. That's literally endless entertainment, until my arms get tired.

I can cook you something fun while you steal the love of my animals and use my UV light to make my phosphorescent and flourescent minerals look fancy.