No Stupid Questions

Is...is...is your chopping board level?

you cut it diagonally so it falls on its side instead of rolling off. make sure your hand is not in the way of the knife.

Use a potato peeler to turn the surface into a polygonal prism rather than a cylinder before you slice

A few ways you do it.

First is for bigger cukes only, really. You cut it in half first. Seems like it isn't answering what you actually asked, but there is an upper limit to how big a slice can get before it's too big. So once a cuke is much bigger than maybe an inch and a half (a little under 4 cm) wide, cut it in half first.

Second is to sacrifice a slice length wise. Take your knife, cut a ribbon off of one side,and you'll have a flat part thru not only reduces/prevents rolling slices, it also makes the job easier. It's a little less pretty maybe, but effective.

Third is to slice at an angle. The rounds then fall over before they can roll. It's also visually appealing, if maybe not better than standard slices.

Fourth, use a barrier. Some damp paper towels (or cloth ones) placed on the edge of your cutting board will stop the slices from going past. Yeah, you can use dry ones, but they tend to move easier, so paper towels will blow away (and cloth ones get knocked away by errant elbows.) But any barrier will do tbh. A long handled spoon, your honing rod, whatever.

Fifth, use a jig. I'm not aware of any brands, but there's veggie cutting jigs with even slice sizes. They have the side benefit of holding things like carrots, cukes, or zucchini and keeping the slices in place. Haven't used one in ages, so I'd have to go searching for a link, and you can do that just as easily; but if you can't find anything, holla back and I'll see what I can find. But you can make your own with a little ingenuity and access to a band saw or even the right hand tools, but the plastic ones are cheaper and lighter.

Sixth is using a damp towel on your cutting surface. I wouldn't do it, but if you pay attention to what you're doing, you won't fuck up the towel and it does work. Has to be damp though, something about that makes the skin grab better than on a dry one.

Seventh is using your hands and speed. If you're feeding the cuke along with the ol' claw finger technique, and slicing/chopping fast, they don't get a chance to roll.

As an alternative to that, the eighth I'm aware of is to partially slice through on your first pass, then come back and finish. The slices don't roll. Won't work on more fibrous veggies, but stuff like cukes or zucchini will stay in place just fine. Takes longer though.

Tbh though, I've always had more trouble with carrots, even with very thin knives that don't wedge much. Which, that helps too, btw. If you pick up a cheap Kiwi nakiri (kiwi is a cheap brand of stamped steel knives, but they rock for some jobs better than the fanciest and most expensive knives. Try one with onions and you'll see what I mean for sure), you'll have way less wedging, so there's less force applied along the side of the slice, meaning they don't roll as much.

Shit, you could probably just push the end of the cuke/zucchini against something weighty as you slice and as long as you don't push hard, it would at least reduce the force the slices would roll with, meaning they wouldn't go far.

Sharp knives also reduce the problem because they go through with less force, leading to less motion as the slices part from the body of the veg.

Legit though, doesn't matter what you do, you'll have some escapees with thick slices. Cukes are much rounder than most similar shaped veggies, and often have smoother skin. So they roll easier than most. Like I said, I had more trouble with carrots, until I got my techniques down and knives that let me do the job smoothly. A decent knife with a thin profile, kept sharp and used appropriately to the design of the knife tends to apply the force in a way that slices fall laterally rather than roll. Plus, if you slice conservatively, the force you're applying across the veg doesn't have enough energy to get the slice moving much. That's easier with a well maintained knife.

Edit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKwE1jHNEww

This is an adaptive system, but the jig they have on it is the first example I found.

Great question. You'll need a really sharp knife.

First you carefully place the cucumber on a cutting board and then dispose of it in a garbage can. Then get a big hunk of cheese from the fridge and take a generous bite off it, chewing thoroughly. Bite and chew the cheese over and over again until the cheese is no more. If you do this right, you can work through a pound of cheese in about 5 minutes.

This way there will be no round slices rolling all over and off your cutting board. Oh and you didn't need the sharp knife for this, but it's good to have one.

How round are y'alls cucumbers?? When I slice it the pieces just tip over

Cut thinner slices? Idk. That never happens to me and I slice cucumber daily. I don't think I could make a slice roll even if I tried to - they just fall over.

Mandolin

I don't. I make one careful, lengthwise cut, then I slice up the halves to get a bunch of semi-circlss. Mostly, I just do this so the cucumber stays planted on the board better (for safety), but not losing the round slices is a nice secondary benefit.

Cut the slices at a slight angle so they tilt over if they roll.

Thats just simply never been an issue for me when cutting cucumber...

Angle the blade slightly so it's not perpendicular to the cucumber.

I use a mandolin usually. But also when cutting a cucumber, i usually cut it into quarters lengthwise before slicing it.

Cut it just down to the skin so the skin holds it together but can easily be broken when you go to plate/put in a bowl with stuff.

I don’t. Raw pickles are disgusting.