I bet it did.
this post was submitted on 11 Mar 2026
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Holy fuck TIL there is an anti-masturbation app.
Wtf
The US speaker of the house Mike Johnson has mentioned many times how he and his son monitor each other’s masturbation habits through an app
Are the app’s servers hosted on Epstein island? A father and son sharing chicken choking habits just sounds creepy.
it's a slideshow of Republican appointees.
Can you believe the developers of that app are paying real money for ads for it? I get Quittr ads online and Facebook all the time. Someone is paying money to try and convince me to not to wank. I can't imagine a bigger waste of money.
uBlock Origin (Lite) will make those pesky ads a distant memory.
The part that really blows my mind is that someone is paying for this app..
Same but then I found out that most people I know pay close to $500/year in subscriptions alone. Some don't even remember all the subscriptions they have! A guy at my work was saying that money was really tight and he saved a ton just by cancelling his Adobe and Capcut subscriptions. That's not on top of at least 3-4 streaming platforms.
I am next to certain this is the app I got to track smoking ages ago, they must have thought I wnked 20 a day at work
Just jerk off. As long as you don't rub your dick raw it's healthy. And Jesus doesn't give a fuck. Mostly because he is not real you dingus.
There's no more reason to doubt the existence of a Jewish carpenter who pissed off the government and got nailed up for it than there is to doubt the existence of the Roman official who ordered the nailing.
The supernatural stuff is a different matter.
Leak? Surely they mean "unintended emission."
Surprise decentralized backup.
IT'S NORMAL OKAY
After the initial amazement, reason kicked back in: of course there would be an app for that, and of course some people would use it and share their intimate life with a company they know nothing about, because it has a bold line "We value your privacy" somewhere on its website.
Huh, I wonder if I should share intimate potentially embarrassing and blackmail worthy details with some random tech company who had an app
Blackmail? There’s an app for that!
Blackmailr? Shoot, sign me up! Intake question 1: Have you ever whacked it on a plane to join the “half-mile-high club?”
My cousin Walter jerked off in public once. True story. He was on a plane to New Mexico when all of a sudden the hydraulics went. The plane started spinning around, going out of control. So he decides it's all over and whips it out and starts beating it right there. So all the other passengers take a cue from him and they start whipping it out and beating like mad. So all the passengers are beating off, plummeting to their certain doom, when all of a sudden, the hydraulics kick back in, and the plane rights itself. It lands safely and everyone puts their pieces or, whatever you know, away and deboard. Nobody mentions the phenomenon to anyone else.
- Brodie Bruce
If they never shared the story, how in fuck did Brodie know‽
I figure he means they all shuffled off the plane looking at the floor. Unless they all kept in touch after beating off together on a plane they have no way to know if anyone told someone else afterwards.
Eyewitness testimony.
Well, that depends, are they also charging you a ludicrous sum of money each month? It would make me feel a lot more confident sharing my intimate details if they also required my credit card. The only thing that could set my mind more at ease would be extensive biometrics
"Porn addiction," like "sex addiction," isn't recognized by the DSM-5, which classifies mental disorders. While porn-viewing can be compulsive, like other behaviors, research suggests that perceived porn addiction predicted distress over actual porn use itself. Yet, the idea of "porn addiction" persists in the U.S., which lacks comprehensive sex education requirements in many states; only 37 percent of states require sex education to be medically accurate, according to Boston University.
What a perfect example of how sexuality is suppressed, controlled, then monetized in the US, and the harm it causes.
Get ready for age verification data breaches like this, except on a worldwide scale.
What a perfect example of how sexuality is suppressed, controlled
You reminded me of a post I saw in r/catholicism. OP wanted to stop masturbating, but wasn't able to overcome the urge and felt very bad about it, knowing it was wrong, and was asking advice. All the comments were in the line of "Just trust and submit to Jesus and he'll help you".
WTF... I felt bad for OP and other people in a situation like that.
All the comments were in the line of "Just trust and submit to Jesus and he'll help you".
Stupid sexy Jesus
Climbs onto the St Andrews Cross to submit
It's like people who reply "rtfm", except these people actually think they are helping, while the rtfm replier just thinks the question asker isn't worthy of their knowledge (or wants to hide that they don't know while maintaining their "I am wise" persona).
A lot of things take decades to make it into the DSM even after identified and labeled by professionals, and a lot of things take decades to be removed after professionals say it's not a pathology.
Yeah. The DSM isn’t the final word here. Obviously any superstimulus will have extreme addictive potential. There’s no reason why pornography would be any different than, say, junk food in this regard.
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project 2025
Is this the one Mike Johnson and his son use?
I think they use covenant eyes, which sees every web page that you view and analyzes text and pictures on every web page. When there is something flagged as sexual on the web page, it sends a report to your "accountability partner". Not sure exactly what's on the report, but safe to assume it shows web address, date, and time that the web page was loaded.
Huge security breach to be on the Speaker's computer.
Wha… t. Fuck, I hate society.
App has AI therapist... We've seen Gemini "helping" volnurable people already.
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Mama didn't raise no quitter!
Oh no, someone might find out they jerk off EVERY DAY!
Rookie numbers
I'm probably wrong but I could swear I messaged them on reddit years ago to ask if they'd release a generalized quit addiction app and they basically said they only cared about nofap.
That particular breed of American Christians who have somehow concluded that Jesus's main message was NO WANKING.
Yep, the evangelical Christian movement in the US tends to obsess over pretty much everything except the stuff Jesus actually said.
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Their security was a bit wank.
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