They already knew he was in the Epstein files!
this post was submitted on 23 Mar 2026
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badposting
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They know he's a sex pest
I’ve been traveling through time for a while now, personally, the only problem I’ve hit is how to go any direction besides forward.
Similarly, people hypothesize about why time travelers haven’t killed Hitler yet, but if you’re a time traveler, why would you choose to live in this timeline? Just make a new one that splits earlier than that, surely it’ll be better.
there was once a guy who killed Hitler as a kid, but then he went back to his time and they all looked at him like "Who the fuck is Adolf Hitler? Did you just kill a baby? Put him in prison for life!" and then he had to go back and stop himself from killing Hitler
That’s why the smarter time travelers try to split the timeline by interrupting Alois and Klara to prevent conception, but it turns out they both have an exhibitionist kink, so this only results in even more timelines where Hitler is born.
That’s why the smarter time travelers try to split the timeline by interrupting Alois and Klara to prevent conception,
Any time traveler left of Bernie Sanders would eventually attempt to lead a protracted people's war aganist the feeble german republic. A smarter comrade would simply hand the spartacists a crate full of ak47s and drones and sit back and enjoy as the planet turns red 
That this did not happen leads us to to a few possablilities
1: Time travel does not exist.
2: Time travel exists but only the stinky imperalists get it.
3:Time travel exists but the Soviet falling is a canon event that must happen for the next stage of communism to progress. 
4:The first comrade to time travel was really, really, bad at it and roams this doomed timeline trying fix their mistakes, failing and digging themselves into deeper and deeper holes because explaining how they ~~accidentally killed rosa luxemburg~~ ~~caused the sinno-soviet split~~ ~~gave henry kisinger immortalilty~~ ~~gave their good friend boris yeltsin a much needed confidence boost~~ ~~trained gorbachev wrong, as a joke~~ ~~watched the soviet union fall~~ ~~slept with george bush~~ ~~did 9/11 out of frustration~~ ~~slept with george bush~~ ~~mugged kisinger thus removing his immortalilty~~ made a fool of themselves on a trip to cuba is too embaressing to explain to the party so they just keep trying to kill Hitler for the thousandth time because nothing else is working and they need at least domething to show for themselves ~~and he's just a man Why. Wont. He. Die! 
~~
Or 5: Number 2 but the time cia is living out number 4 but with castro still lmao. 
ⓘ This user is suspected of being a TIME TRAVELING cat. Please report any suspicious behavior.
Alternative explanation: by the time time-travel is invented the world is already long time communist and the idea of Great Man theory of history does not even occur to anyone.
Hitler is the guy we got after time travelers killed all the more competent Nazi figureheads in their respective cribs
What I’m hearing is that the real strategy is to kill Paul von Hindenburg so that he can’t appoint Hitler as chancellor.
The ww2 working group at time traveler headquarters tried that, it just resulted in Freidrich Ebert appointing a more effective Nazi
This is why I’ve been advocating for ever earlier splits. Some asshole decided leaving the ocean was OK, but it really never was.
Hitler himself was the time traveler. He is just really bad at it.
Hell yeah got his ass
You’re a time traveler and can go to any party at any time you want. Are you going to go to some boring party nobody else showed up for either, just to prove you can time travel? Obviously not.
Steven (Hawkins) Universe 
I was there but you're right he's a horrible host, it's like if you don't have a nobel prize or a best seller under your belt then you are just invisible to him.
This post has been fact checked TRUE by our team of Time Patriots.