This penchant for collective punishment but aversion to collective responsibility displayed by whites is seriously a poison in every respect.
I grew up going to my mosque every week. In that time I can say that whenever there was some occurrence of violence perpetuated by what the western media claimed to be Muslims, I'd be fearful for that week's trip to the mosque.
A childhood of anxiety as I'd prostrate onto a stone and hold my breath thinking, "there's a chance today's the day that some paleskinned freak comes in guns blazing and rains lead upon us." Than, I'd put head up from the stone, and nothing happened. The same thought repeated with every prostration but eventually the prayer would end and we'd be fine. From there, the night would go on and I'd move on until the next newscycle.
That was my childhood. My generation in my community could probably all tell you a similiar feeling. Something we don't really talk about but I'm sure it's consistent between us all to some degree.
To this day when I go to my mosque I have the same feeling itching feeling every time I put my head down to the stone. It's less invasive, less fearful, and less persistent, but that paranoid little boy never truly left.
However, now after the small spike of anxiety, slight terror isn't the main followup, now it's a very spiteful anger.
Why the fuck did I have to grow up with that feeling? Why did any of my brothers and sisters have to feel it? Why were we told that as representatives of our faith we must take into consideration the fragile sentiments of those whites who despised us? Why must we be on our best behavior as if we are guests in another man's home?
We are not guests, intruding upon the Yankees pristine estate, our parents had struggled fiercely to carve out a community against capitlist ruthless individualism. How we carry ourselves is for our own self respect not because we should fear rabid reactionaries. No child should be instilled with that fear. It is the least I can do to make sure no other child from our community feels that spike if anxiety my childhood self did.
Our parents tried to be cordial with the denizens if empire who we call our neighbors. They had to, it was a matter of survival when our communities were less established. However that's not an approach my generation can take.
The Yankees never chose to act in good faith towards us, and so our cordiality must end as well.
Apologies if I'm rambling but I wanted to express my thoughts.