I read that if you make friends with crows you become their bitch, they don't take "no" for an answer after that. Your only option in the future may be to move.
this post was submitted on 03 Jun 2026
89 points (98.9% liked)
No Stupid Questions
48339 readers
468 users here now
No such thing. Ask away!
!nostupidquestions is a community dedicated to being helpful and answering each others' questions on various topics.
The rules for posting and commenting, besides the rules defined here for lemmy.world, are as follows:
Rules (interactive)
Rule 1- All posts must be legitimate questions. All post titles must include a question.
All posts must be legitimate questions, and all post titles must include a question. Questions that are joke or trolling questions, memes, song lyrics as title, etc. are not allowed here. See Rule 6 for all exceptions.
Rule 2- Your question subject cannot be illegal or NSFW material.
Your question subject cannot be illegal or NSFW material. You will be warned first, banned second.
Rule 3- Do not seek mental, medical and professional help here.
Do not seek mental, medical and professional help here. Breaking this rule will not get you or your post removed, but it will put you at risk, and possibly in danger.
Rule 4- No self promotion or upvote-farming of any kind.
That's it.
Rule 5- No baiting or sealioning or promoting an agenda.
Questions which, instead of being of an innocuous nature, are specifically intended (based on reports and in the opinion of our crack moderation team) to bait users into ideological wars on charged political topics will be removed and the authors warned - or banned - depending on severity.
Rule 6- Regarding META posts and joke questions.
Provided it is about the community itself, you may post non-question posts using the [META] tag on your post title.
On fridays, you are allowed to post meme and troll questions, on the condition that it's in text format only, and conforms with our other rules. These posts MUST include the [NSQ Friday] tag in their title.
If you post a serious question on friday and are looking only for legitimate answers, then please include the [Serious] tag on your post. Irrelevant replies will then be removed by moderators.
Rule 7- You can't intentionally annoy, mock, or harass other members.
If you intentionally annoy, mock, harass, or discriminate against any individual member, you will be removed.
Likewise, if you are a member, sympathiser or a resemblant of a movement that is known to largely hate, mock, discriminate against, and/or want to take lives of a group of people, and you were provably vocal about your hate, then you will be banned on sight.
Rule 8- All comments should try to stay relevant to their parent content.
Rule 9- Reposts from other platforms are not allowed.
Let everyone have their own content.
Rule 10- Majority of bots aren't allowed to participate here. This includes using AI responses and summaries.
Credits
Our breathtaking icon was bestowed upon us by @Cevilia!
The greatest banner of all time: by @TheOneWithTheHair!
founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
You might not be allowed to feed them directly, but I bet you can eat a messy sandwich or souvlaki that drops a bunch of meat and cheese.
But now you might just be feeding them without them seeing it as a friendly action and get no benefits.
Huh I had no idea we're not allowed to feed crows.
I got dive bombed years ago one summer, after which I started bribing the crows with peanuts from my balcony. I started by just putting them on my railing, backing away and letting them see me as they grabbed them. Now they're used to me and let me get pretty close, or come hang out when I'm out there.
They've got babies out front of my building this week and show no interest in me or my dog, but I see them bombing other people regularly.
I've heard that crows seem to recognize offerings made to them and respond well. Try going outside and, while in their sight (not too close, though), present some food to them where they can see it, carefully place it on the ground, and slowly back away out of sight once more. You may have to do this for multiple days or maybe even weeks, not sure. Otherwise, you can take solace in the fact that nesting season will probably be over shortly as crows usually only raise 1 brood a year. They also don't usually reuse nests, but have been known to build on top of prior successful nests.
You should post an update somewhere in a week or two because this is pretty interesting!
Gift them something shiny.
If I were a young parent I wouldn’t want something shiny, I’d want diapers.
I’d put out an array of snacks and see which one they pick first, then add more of that the next day.
If someone feeds my babies reliably and conveniently I’ll forgive them pretty quick.
They say it takes ten seconds to break trust but ten years to rebuild it, so OP is gonna have to play the long game.
Yeah, but... You're not a crow.
I like to imagine crows as lazy.
I don't want them to become too dependent on me, in case it hurts their ability to find food on their own.
How much food would be reasonable but not excessive?
You can give them a lot. Birds are like humans they aren’t going to eat too much of the same thing. Even feeding birds in your backyard will only make up about 25% of their consumption. The rest they get from live bugs, berries, etc.
I wish I was a crow biologist so I could help you. But I know crows like peanuts, so maybe a peanut, an almond, and a pecan and go from there.
Interspecies communication has to start slowly.
Fact
Wait until the younglings are gone and then try to offer food on the reg. You need to be present. And be prepared for stubborn refusal.
They are smart birds to a point. If you leave some sticks out and then later they incorporate them into their nest, they won't think oh this kind human did this for me. They needed sticks and took them. If you stay out of their feathers they're not thinking oh this human is so respectful of my boundaries. They're thinking this terrain is mine! So you're operating on the assumption that you have some sort of getting along with the creatures credit that only exists in your mind. As far as the birds are concerned you were at best a dormant threat they could live with until something made you an active one and you got attacked. And now that's all you are. And it'll take time and effort to change that.
Shiney things, soft bits of fabric maybe? Also don't see why you couldn't forget some diced cheese or something gut friendly across species that you were enjoying on the step when you have to duck inside to make a phone call?
Just as an amateur naturist, based on what I've read, I'm thinking it would probably be useful for you to be proactive here and make friends with these intelligent animals, not just get along with them.
So I'd recommend doing a little research and following up, which I'm thinking might involve leaving them out some kind of preferred food on a regular basis, that kind of thing.
Just as an amateur naturist…
I’m not an expert in corvid behaviour either, but I doubt showing your naughty bits to crows is the best course of action.
They usually get a chuckle or two, so it's all good.
Life in 2026 getting so bad the crows are extorting us now
It's kind of like sharing a living space with someone-- good to put in a little effort to get along and be flexible rather than get off on the wrong foot and potentially antagonise them.
I don't have a solution but I wanna bump this question, I am invested now.
How could ya not be
I mean, ya gotta make amends. Give healthy food on a schedule so they know you're committed. Perhaps leave a kindly note with a shiny bead.
Mealworms, for chickens, get a 10lb bag if you can, few other animals will go for them and crows love them. Unsalted peanuts in the shell because they like to break them open, but other animals will go after them too.
Buy them french fries daily. Get the ones in the red carton, you know the ones. The red carton will help build visual memory. Every day, toss them some french fries. Make sure they see you.
Peace offering. Try giving them bread (good one from bakery) but I’m no specialist
bread bloats the bird's stomach, other food would be better
What kind of bread does a crow consider to be good? I know birds can't taste spiciness, but that's about it
The ones in my neighborhood prefer unsalted peanuts.
As for the city codes—while they could probably get you for it if they wanted, I think those laws are intended more for the folks who throw out a whole cup of birdseed to attract flocks of pigeons. It’s better for crows if you throw out one or two nuts at a time, discreetly so other birds don’t see.
There was an account on Mastodon who tried a lot of things with crow. Sadly I didn’t found it.
From memory: « his » crow liked the one with crushed nuts
Bread
Give them some grapes. Probably cheese would work too :)
Explosives