this post was submitted on 09 Jul 2026
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Not The Onion

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[–] HexadecimalSky@lemmy.world 3 points 7 hours ago

There are too many threads in this thread I want some mindwipe for.........dammm this is one of the stories like that lady who had a plant growing in her wooha that makes you just go. Huh.

[–] TheTechnician27@lemmy.world 118 points 2 days ago (1 children)

It was still alive, and slithered and squirmed on the surgical table.

Great.

[–] YetAnotherNerd@sopuli.xyz 78 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Google how do I delete someone else’s account

[–] blazeknave@lemmy.world 19 points 2 days ago

*how to delete my eyes

[–] Doom@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago

If it's Instagram you can ask their AI to do it for you.

[–] macaw_dean_settle@lemmy.world 8 points 2 days ago

Use a better search like Bing or duckduckgo. googol sucks and was never any good.

[–] celeste@kbin.earth 129 points 2 days ago (1 children)

This is the second worm found in this guy...

For unexplained reasons, the [first] worm was not identified, and he was not treated with anti-parasitic drugs after the discovery.

I'm trying to imagine pulling a parasite out of a guy and not even wondering what kind it is.

[–] UndulyUnruly@lemmy.world 29 points 2 days ago

Who’s your worm guy?

[–] ZombieCyborgFromOuterSpace@piefed.ca 55 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Imagine shooting a load and it crawls back up your dick for some reason.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 61 points 2 days ago (6 children)
[–] Crackhappy@lemmy.world 15 points 1 day ago

What the fuck is wrong with you.

[–] massive_bereavement@fedia.io 7 points 1 day ago

You saw this and decided to share it.

[–] pastermil@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

It would probably be as scary to be a girl having her first sex.

Or ever. Unprotected sex meaning you have to fish out the little bugger, though it'd make avoiding unwanted pregnancy easier. You'd just need a little net, maybe a bait trap.

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[–] Deme@sopuli.xyz 87 points 2 days ago (4 children)

The man’s only recollection of a possible exposure was eating raw snake meat during military service 50 years prior.

Based

[–] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 5 points 1 day ago

Oh, thank god the snake meat I ate during military service 50 years ago was cooked! 🥴

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 30 points 2 days ago

Oh, it's just baby snakes

[–] RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] JamesTBagg@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago

It's not hazing. I'll bet it was during the Cobra Gold exercise, during which Thailand hosts various militaries including the US Marines. Part of the training traded is survival skills specific to the jungle environments Thailand provides, which includes eating of animals, dead or alive. Spiders, scorpions, snakes... one of the traditional hallmarks being the drinking of cobra blood as an alternative to being able to find clean water.

[–] Stern@lemmy.world 19 points 1 day ago (2 children)

"Hey babe, I got ten inches in my pants..."

[–] Wildone@sh.itjust.works 3 points 8 hours ago* (last edited 8 hours ago)

... his wife was categorically against this surgery, and requested they reverse it immediately. Put it back!

[–] pastermil@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

"Probably not the type that you'd like tho."

[–] TIEPilot@lemmy.world 55 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Humans aren’t a definitive host for the worms, and they become destined to aimlessly wander through our meat sacks.

What a way with words!

[–] Tikiporch@lemmy.world 12 points 2 days ago (3 children)

What are they surviving on? It ain't like I got a pantry of snacks hidden in my groin.

[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 8 points 1 day ago

tapeworms have no digestive system, so they absorb nutrients through thier integument, probably just living off of the body fluids. this is how intestinal tapeworms absorb food too.

You should try it. Makes first dates really interesting.

[–] TIEPilot@lemmy.world 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Good point, I didn't think about that. I get how they survive in the intestines but in the crotchal region what are they nibbling on?

[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 7 points 1 day ago

tapeworms being parasitic have no digestive system, they absorb nutrients through thier cuticles.

[–] _thebrain_@sh.itjust.works 41 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

I'm sure the worm was equally surprised to find the doctors

[–] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

Oh, I'm glad I found you, doc, please fix this cat I've been living in, it's layout is all wrong, I think he's very sick! Please save him, he's very important to me!

[–] WingedObsidian@sh.itjust.works 39 points 2 days ago

Fuck this so much

[–] Photonic@lemmy.world 31 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (5 children)

Well when I had elective surgery they found a live anaconda in my groin

….

I’ll show myself out…

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[–] comador@lemmy.world 25 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Quote: "Adding to the oddity, the man told the surgeons that this had actually happened to him before..."

Sounds like he drinks unboiled lake/river water. Gross.

[–] quick_snail@feddit.nl 3 points 1 day ago

Possibly. The article just mentions he ate a raw snake

[–] homesweethomeMrL@lemmy.world 23 points 2 days ago

Nope. Nope nope nope.

[–] eaterofclowns@lemmy.world 13 points 2 days ago (1 children)

In worm lore they're piloting this dude like an eva and their bravest keep getting taken by malevolent gods

[–] pastermil@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 day ago (3 children)

You must be watching the (very) wrong version of Ratatouille.

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[–] fubarx@lemmy.world 14 points 2 days ago* (last edited 20 hours ago)

Lifespan was 20-30 years. Least it could have done was pick up a case of beer.

[–] lavenderbreton@slrpnk.net 15 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Good thing he got to worm his way out of this dilemma.

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[–] Martineski@lemmy.dbzer0.com 12 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Lovely. Encountered this post while eating and as I'm about to be full.

[–] SharkAttak@kbin.melroy.org 12 points 2 days ago (1 children)
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