bearboiblake

other countries wish they treated disabled people as well as America

Sorry to be a downer - the ADA itself is very good, but it's not the only factor in determining quality of life for a disabled person. I'm disabled and my country's equivalent of the ADA is about 90% as strong, but access to disability benefits (i.e., money) is much much stronger in my country than it is in the US. I used to be pretty active in disability forums, the whole benefits system in the US sounds fucking nightmarish for disabled people.

I know I'm not, and I'm not trying to be, I'm trying to encourage you to seek out a therapist yourself.

I'm sorry you feel that way, but your feelings are totally valid. I promise, I'm not trying to win, and I don't think any of those negative things about you, I'm just talking to you, man to man. If it helps we can take this discussion to DMs.

It isn't that you disagree with me, loads of people disagree with me all the time, and I can count on one hand the number of people I have suggested therapy to.

I promise you, I know you don't believe me, but I am trying to help you.

Well, I suggest speaking to a therapist, and sharing this thread with them, and talking it through with them, I'm sure they can really help a lot.

That's not what I said - it's totally understandable to doubt the veracity of the story, or to call it ragebait, and so on. I completely understand all of that, and actually I broadly agree.

What I'm actually talking about is how volatile some of these commenters are, who see a story like this, and react very strongly to it, who get really really upset and angry about the story. An emotionally well-adjusted person can just say, "this story is bullshit" without seeing it as a personal attack, right?

I can clearly see that a lot of people are being triggered by this story, which suggests to me that they would benefit from therapy, so that they can learn to manage their triggers and emotions better. Again, there's no shame in being triggered or upset by a story like this, but if it gets someone so worked up that they need to go to war in the comments over it, that's what's happening, and therapy is the most helpful way to learn how to cope with problems like that.

Post-edit reply: I'm not saying anything disparaging about your theraputic journey - again I applaud you for doing it, and I encourage you to continue. I think that's really healthy. But you have to realize, that what you're doing here, is you are taking something I wrote, which wasn't aimed at you, personally - that's a classic sign of an insecure person, right? Again, no shame there, I want to help you become the best version of yourself that you can be.

Your feelings are valid, and I apologise if it came across that way, I definitely could have worded it better. It's okay to be insecure, there's nothing there to be ashamed of, as I wrote in my own post, I struggled a lot with insecurity myself.

I'm not shaming or belittling you, I applaud you for seeking out therapy and I encourage you to continue to do so.

Can I ask what made you consider therapy in the first place?

I'm really glad to hear that therapy helped you, thank you for sharing that - I hope that helps other men who have similar struggles as you to take the plunge and get the help they need.

On a personal note, though, I just had a quick look at your comments and honestly, it feels like you still have a lot of unresolved issues here that you'd benefit from getting off your chest in a safe environment, so I'd suggest more therapy. I'm sorry that people have hurt you, and that isn't your fault, but if you continue to let it dominate your life, it will hurt you in ways that you'll never really understand.

Much love & solidarity.

Some of these comments are absolutely disgusting, many of you guys desperately need to talk to a therapist. If you read a story like this and feel the need to defend your gender identity, you have some deep-seated insecurity which you should take seriously before it starts harming your relationships with others. I am saying this as a man who had deep-seated insecurity which took a heavy toll on my relationships before seeking years of therapy. It's not as expensive as it sounds, I promise, and it could totally change your life for the better.