this post was submitted on 09 Jul 2026
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Not The Onion

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A Republican candidate for Congress offered up his analysis of human sexuality and gender on Tuesday, in a group interview with South Florida’s Sun-Sentinel editorial board, alongside two other Republicans running to represent House District 20 in Broward County.

“You never see a giraffe, a male giraffe, that mate(s) with a giraffe,” Rod Joseph said. “Myself right now saying, ‘I am a giraffe,’ that doesn’t mean it’s true.”

Everyone is “born straight,” he offered.

The unusual assertion was made in answer to a question about U.S. Rep. Andy Ogles (R-TN) declaration at the beginning of Pride Month, “Homosexuality has no place in America.”

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[–] MojoMcJojo@lemmy.world 30 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Because he likes dick, I guarantee it.

"You aren't born liking dick. You choose to like dick, just like I'm choosing not to like dick. I don't like dick, I don't like dick, I don't like dick, I don't, I don't, I don't"

[–] OryxAndCake@slrpnk.net 12 points 2 days ago (1 children)

“You aren’t born liking dick. You choose to like dick, just like I’m choosing not to like dick. I don’t like dick, I don’t like dick, I don’t like dick, I don’t, I don’t, I don’t”

He says to himself while gargling balls in a public restroom.

[–] PattyMcB@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I mean if he stays away from the dick and just gargles the balls, maybe he really doesn't like dick

(He's still lying to himself and self-loathing, but what if?)

[–] MojoMcJojo@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

I do like balls, I don't like dick, I do like balls, I don't like dick, I do like grglgrglgrgl..vote for me!