this post was submitted on 25 Aug 2026
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As a bi dude, I'm still down.
Hey as long as we’ve got experts here, could a purely non binary person be considered gay or heterosexual in any configuration or are they always bisexual? Even if only as a limitation of the language?
To elaborate on that I am nonbinary and bisexual myself and without missing a beat it’s like every non-binary person I meet is also bisexual. And that’s all good and all feels very natural, and nobody should feel pressured to be anything else
But like, if I was trying to not be bisexual, what would that look that? Would I just start listing specific preferences and the orientation just wouldn’t have a particular name?
I have no idea if it is proper, but I've always just used queer.
Doesn’t need to be proper! I use queer as well, it’s widely used in my in-person community. I tend to avoid using “queer” online sometimes just because it seems like it can still be a heavy word in other places, but it also seems like I’m seeing it used more often anyway
How about you stop force-labelling people and just love what you love and let others love without judgment?
Oh, are you one of those people who just skim over random words from a paragraph and respond based on the vibe of what you think was said?
Nope. Responded to your whole message.
Please elaborate what you are hinting at.
There is no hinting. I am directly accusing you of interpretive cherry picking, with the added politeness of suggesting that it may be unintentional. I will continue to be polite in this fashion, although I have growing doubts as to your sincerity.
Since you read that, what about it sounded judgy and prescriptivist?
Maybe gay if you're only into enbies?
I’ve considered that, and I agree in theory, but is that something that occurs on the level of sexual attraction?
In practice I feel like it’s a romantic quality, i.e. “since we are both non-binary, I feel we understand each other and I feel especially safe with you, and in fact this type of relationship is the only one I would want”,
I suppose in this manner you could easily be a gay demisexual enbie, but I wonder of the larger cohort of people who experience a more immediate sexual attraction
Again, not that it’s important to have this all ironed out neatly. I just feel like it hasn’t been ironed out neatly, you know?
That does sound a lot like demisexual to me.
If you call yourself homosexual I worry that some people might misinterpret it and try and figure out a binary gender for you, which is unhelpful.
You could just say you're attracted to other enbies if someone asks? One word labels aren't always the most important thing.