this post was submitted on 01 Oct 2026
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Counterpoint: teenagers are also doing everything in absolutely fucking slow motion. My oldest just moves so fucking slow doing anything. Sure a 4h task in 30min is excessive (and hyperbole) but something like emptying the dishwasher, which is literally a 3min task, takes them 10min, on top of the 15min it takes them to even start doing it from when I ask them to.
At work, we have people that build components based on what's on their "in rack". If it looks empty but it's the middle of the day, they'll work slower to make the work last. If the rack is full but they are feeling overloaded, they'll also work slower to make sure more doesn't get piled on top. If it's "just right" on volume and difficulty, they will work really fast.
I guess what I'm saying is, maybe the kid knows by doing a task in 3 minutes, they will be assigned more work? I'm sure they can do things they want to do extremely fast.
Be glad they are doing it. Let them do it at their own pace. Complaining will only make things worse.
They don't have the experience you have doing all these tasks. They could do it fast but half-assed. Or they can do it slow but good enough. But they can't do it fast and good.
You sound like an employer who thinks tasks can to be done in an instant.
It takes longer than 3 minutes to empty a dishwasher for example. It just feels that way for you because you can disable your brain when doing so. They can't, because they don't know where every little thing is located in your kitchen.
I urge you to time it next time. And not to speedrun it either.
No I've actually timed it, just for fun, and it's literally 3min start to finish. Doing it as fast as I can is just shy of 2min.
You talk about teens like they're some sort of incapable halfwits.
Well, they're teens. They were incapable halfwits but are slowly transitioning to angsty molasses.
Also they've not yet broken their joyful minds by menial and repetitive work. Just wait for their dreams to die and they'll be more docile.
Have you tried stealing her phone and hiding it the dishwasher to teach her a lesson and undermine her trust in you? According to the memes, that's the way to handle this.
I don't have any girls...so that would be no?