badposting
badposting is a comm where you post badly
This is not a !the_dunk_tank@hexbear.net alternative. This is not a !memes@hexbear.net alternative. This is a place for you to post your bad posts.
Ever had a really shitty bit idea? Joke you want to take way past the point of where it was funny? Want to feel like a stand-up comedy guy who's been bombing a set for the past 30 minutes straight and at this point is just saying shit to see if people react to it? Really bad pun? A homemade cringe concoction? A cognitohazard that you have birthed into this world and have an urge to spread like chain mail?
Rules:
- Do not post good posts.
- Unauthorized goodposting is to be punished in the manner of commenting the phrase "GOOD post" followed by an emoji that has not yet been used in the thread
- Use an emoticon/kaomoji/rule-three-abiding ASCII art if the rations run out
- This is not a comm where you direct people to other people's bad posts. This is a comm where you post badly.
- This rule intentionally left blank.
- If you're struck for rule 3, skill issue, not allowed to complain about it.
Code of Conduct applies just as much here as it does everywhere else. Technically, CoC violations are bad posts. On the other hand: L + ratio + get ~~better~~ worse material bozo
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Alright it's time to get something straight. "Literally" has never been used to mean "figuratively" and I'm tired of people who say it has. If you love descriptivism so much maybe you should stop accidentally trying to change the language from the top down. "But people use it figuratively all the time" yeah man people use "honestly" all the time when they're fucking lying, that doesnt change the meaning of the word, or it wouldn't be a fucking lie anymore would it?
"But people say they literally died. That's not even possible"
They didn't say the word "literally" to inform you that they are alive. If they used the word "literally" with any kind of innovative meaning there, it's equivalent to "fucken" or "fr fr" or even just "um" - which are not even close to what "figuratively" means
"Dead" doesn't only mean entered the goddamn afterlife. It also means shut down, such as when you're in a state of mental or physical overload. The reason someone says they "literally" shut down in that situation, is to signal that they aren't flippantly overusing extreme language - no, are saying the shock of embarassment or exasperation they experienced wasnt some minor hiccup that they're embellishing.
The word "literally" is a word, like any other... It's not a fucking CIA trigger word that turns you into Amelia Bedelia, hunting for some way to interpret everything like an idiot.
It's ironic that in an attempt to be maximally descriptive, some actual fucking dictionary writers are spontaneously inventing and prescribing an unnecessary and harmful change in language. Yes harmful! It's a clarifying word used in the exact same context specifically to clear up confusion about figurative or non-figurative communication. Even if you are illiterate enough to believe this supposed new usage already exists, we have to use this fucking language! I also don't want you to decide that Red is another way of saying Green and that Left is a valid way to say Right just because you thought you heard it like that. I have to speak this fucking language god damn you! Stop it!
You can’t actually use “figuratively” when you use “literally” though.
“It is figuratively raining cats and dogs” isn’t actually correct. You have to say “it’s raining cats and dogs, figuratively speaking.” “Figuratively” describes the expression. It doesn’t modify it.
“It’s literally raining cats and dogs” does modify the expression, and in an important way. Sometimes people say it’s for adding emphasis, which isn’t wrong, but being more precise about it, “literally” here is saying that the amount of rain currently happening is the precise amount of rain that the expression was invented to describe. Which actually is pretty close to the prescriptively correct usage of “literally” to begin with but as applied to expressions and not words - asserting that the literal meaning of the expression currently applies. I’m not just saying it’s raining cats and dogs, it really is raining cats and dogs right now in the true sense of that expression.
When you say “it’s literally raining cats and dogs” you are speaking figuratively. Figuratively describes the mode of speech. It doesn’t describe the amount of rain.
What’s more, often the use of “literally” isn’t even a figurative mode of speech but actually a metaphorical mode of speech. “I literally died laughing” is not a figurative mode of speech. It is a metaphorical mode of speech.
Many dictionary writers seem to think that when people are using literally they are using a synonym of figuratively that fits the same exact grammatical structure as literally
And yes, this:
Is exactly what I'm getting at.
And yes also you can say something is figurative or metaphorical but the important part here is that if literally means metaphorical or figurative it means non-literal. I chose "figurative" so I wouldn't have to say "non-literal" and make the whole thing impossible to parse. I'm pretty sure metaphorical language is a subset of figurative language anyway.
The result of this 30 some odd year campaign of misinformation might be that people start saying "wait are you dead ass?" online and getting "I am being literal." as a response and people get pissed off until the word just cannot be used anymore because it can only confuse people and there's actually no context that can make the word more useful than just guessing based on the other context clues.
Why do that to a perfectly good word that is sort of important when people are constantly speaking in riddle
I’ve never agreed with someone more strongly in my life. You’re my Lenin.
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