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my father said you are gay if you don't like sports and you read books.
Turns out it was just a coincidence
It's not that I don't like sports, I don't understand it.
There seems to be plenty of money in the sport. Why can't they just BUY another ball and give one ball to BOTH teams?
I vividly remember my dad telling me football was "too complicated" to explain and so I just assumed it was some mystical unknowable sport and checked out of any conversation involving it.
It wasn't until I was like 25 that I put any effort into understanding the sport and like... He could have just told me "we want the guys in blue to get the ball and run to the other side" and then we could have bonded over that. Weird thing to be lazy about as a dad.
US Football is a little more complicated than, say, hockey.
All you really need to know to enjoy hockey (other than the good guys need to put the puck in the other guys' net) is the blue line. There are more rules than that, obviously, but once you understand that, the stoppage and player behaviors in hockey make a whole lot more sense.
In football, you've got four downs to go 10 yards at a time. You get six points for ending up in the end zone, and then you can either kick between the posts for one point, or try again for two points (not six points this time). You can kick between the posts at any time, too (but it'll only get you three points). Sometimes, they just kick the ball way up and out to the other team. One of the teams can grab onto the opposing players, but not like that, except sometimes that's OK, but never like that. Also jets flyover and a bunch of people play music in the middle of the field. 😵💫
And they still haven't decided what the definitions of a catch, pass interference, taunting, unsportsmanlike conduct, roughing the passer, and holding are.
My favorite foul that happens every season: "Personal foul, number 42 Defense, not allowing a Tom Brady (or the star quarterback of the year) touchdown. Half the distance to the goal line. Repeat third down."
Practically every sport can be boiled down to “2 groups of people disagreeing where a ball should go”.
Idk, in golf and bowling everyone seems to be agreement about where the ball should go, if not who should successfully get it there.
Billiards too, but there are more destination options.
Bowling? Throwing a huge heavy ball at some things that don't move?
Not very sportsman like.
Exactly, WHY disagree?
Cooperative sports would be interesting. Two teams come in, and they need to get a ball through some obstacles together...
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chinlone
Because then no fighting over ball. Can’t have that, now can we?
Yeah! And why don‘t they ever get it right? Something always goes wrong and they have to do it all over again next year.
I don't like sports, but I don't like books either.
Am I bi?
I like sports and reading. Am I asexual or also bi?
Let’s find out!
By your father’s standards, I am gay.
By your gay standards, I am father
daddy*