Ask Lemmy
A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions
Rules: (interactive)
1) Be nice and; have fun
Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, toxicity and dog-whistling are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them
2) All posts must end with a '?'
This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?
3) No spam
Please do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.
4) NSFW is okay, within reason
Just remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com.
NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].
5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions.
If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.
6) No US Politics.
Please don't post about current US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world or !uspolitics@lemmy.world
7) No Hit-and-Run questions.
Please don't delete your post for no apparent reason. If you plan on deleting a question later, say so in the post, or if you feel that you have a good reason to remove it, message a mod beforehand. It's not fair to the ones who took their time to answer, and it's not in the spirit of the community.
8) No Bots.
Posts or comments from bots, LLM's, AIs, Neural Networks, Transformers, or Marvin the Paranoid Android are not welcome in AskLemmy. Real humans only please.
Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.
Partnered Communities:
Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu
view the rest of the comments
"I will love you no matter what"
That changed real fuckin fast when i came out as trans
At least my father never made that promise. But yeah it's amazing how many parents have such a ridiculous condition on their love
So sorry the love they had for you was conditional :(
I still have to have that conversation with my parents. It's nerve-wracking!! I need to just rip that bandaid off and be done with it.
Right up there with "you can ask us anything". Well they certainly didn't expect neurodiverse questions there.
But to be fair the statement also doesn't include that there have to be good answers.
I was always careful never to tell my child I would love them no matter what.
If they came out as trans (or any lbgt+) I would still love them.
If they became a maniac killer I wouldn’t.
I'd still love my kid if they became a maniac killer. I would feel so guilty as the parent. I would dedicate my life to anonymously making the victims' lives better. I wouldnt protect the kid from legal justice. I would turn them in myself the moment I knew. But I would still love them. Because if I don't love my kid as a maniac killer, who would? I'm not saying it would be easy.
I love my kid unconditionally. At least I believe I do. I can say lots of things.
🫂
Getting rid of toxic people is first step towards a happier life. You'll sooner or later find like minded people.
Big hugs friend ...
Just an apropos of nothing ....
I've had two friends tell me how they're sick of this woke shit. I said, I hear more whining about woke shit than any woke shit so you're gonna have to be specific. He said, "Chris' kid thinks he's trans now, like he's too young what the fuck is that?"
I was like, "I've never met Chris' kid and it seems you think they're doing it for attention but what if they are ..?"
It's like ... trans people got their own shit that they're going through and some of my friends act like it's their problem somehow.
The claims of "doing it for attention" are so silly to me. I can think of so many easier ways to get attention
Also, like... so what if they are? Maybe it really is "just a phase" or whatever the fuck else someone wants to dismissively ascribe any behavior to.
Does that really mean the kid is any less deserving of the attention, connection, and understanding ear they are clearly crying out for? Is ignoring, shunning, or otherwise socially punishing them really the best way to address it?
Like you said, there are much easier ways to get attention. If someone is willing to claim to be trans just for the attention, then they are in serious need of a better support structure in their lives. Giving them shit for it isn't going to help anything.
Sorry that happened, mate. One of our older kids is gay. Our 16 year old is non-binary. I don't give a shit as long as they are able to thrive without assholes standing in their way. They are always welcome in my home along with any partners they find happiness with. I'm sorry I can’t be that for every child who lost the people who were supposed to have their back no matter what.
Yea same here, my mother told me that she will never be able to come to terms with my #decision
Ironic, since these parents are choosing to be terrible people filled with hate.
Now that I think about it, this is surely almost always a lie? I doubt many people will keep loving someone once they find out they're a serial killer, pedophile, or worse, a conservative.
Disapproving of someone's choices and actions doesn't mean you don't love them anymore. In fact that's why it hurts more when someone you love does something truly heinous. It's often hard to just suddenly let go when it's your child, sibling, etc.
We can still love each and every one of them, and tell them so during visiting hours. Especially the conservative, as I suspect they quickly become some bubba's bitch.
🫂
I hope you've got people who love you for you in your life, now.